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*ddythehatter
writes: Hi, my girlfriend broke up with me last night, because she has found a new her, and has a new, more positive view on life. She said that now she needs to rediscover herself on her own and not be with anyone while she figures herself out. She said she still loves me and she needs me, but as a friend now. She used the following metaphor: I've held her hand as I helped her onto and across the balance beam, and down the other side. However, now she's off she needs to be on her own 2 feet but still needs me for guidance.' I'm head over heels in love with her and I know she feels the same. I need to be with her, cos I love her so much. Someone please help?
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (11 May 2005):
 I'm sorry to try to make you face reality but if she was also head over heels in love with you, why would she break up with you? Even if she does want to be independent and find her way, she would still want you by her side, she would still want to continue a relationship with you.People do change and want to try new things but normally, when they are with someone and in love, they wish to share these new experiences with the person in their life.Needing you for guidance strikes me more like using I'm afraid. If she wants to stand on her own two feet, let her, on her own! I don't mean to sound brutal but it seems to me that she may have been using you all along. I mean; 'You helped her onto and across the balance beam' Is that it? Were you just in her life to give her a leg up?No, I think you should let her get on with it. I know you love her but let her go and get on with your own life. Find someone who will value you for who and what you are and not just as a life support machine.Good luck.
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