A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupid, Happy st.stephens day to yee all!!I have posted the problem related to this guy before- and I hope you all could help me again!!i met him in late Sept this year 2010, we were getting along so great for a month. After a month of dating him, I knew that I really like him and i'm ready to sleep with him... but then after that night, he didn't contact me for about a month..Then we kind of got back on the track this month..We get along well but I do not know where I am standing..I wanted to ask him what happend like during that month but I couldn't really bring up that question when I met him again... and I think I really like him more than I should at this moment, and I do not know what to do with my feelings. I'd rather walk away if there's nothing like chance of developing a relationship. Because I think i'd hurt myself keep thinking that there's something while dating him.I also have this personal problem as well because I'm moving to the another country for three months next year in march and his ex and he broke up because she moved to the very same country that i'm about to move in next Mar. Does he just want to have some nice time with me without any sort of commitment or..?is it ok to ask him (guys I need ur help!)..? I don't know what I should do...Thank you very much. x
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi guys, heres update for you two.
I told him everything..and we had a good chat...
but the bottom line is that he does not want a relationship since he was out of relationship like last august. He doesnt want to have anything serious...:( I dont know what to do..I just like him a lot more than I should have... :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for your answers, I will let you know how it goes. x x x
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010): You have to talk to him. Otherwise he might walk all over you.It's not a good thing that he left after sleeping with you and didn't contact you again. It's even worse that you don't know why. It's also not good to not know what's going to happen and part of that is down to the fact that he already ditched you really easily once, and now you've started seeing him again, like nothing even happened. I think you like him so much you're scared to ask him why in case he runs off again but that will probably happen anyway. The very least you deserve is to know why he ditched you in the first place. Because honestly OP you're wandering into this like a headless chicken if you don't know those details. If you just let that go like nothing happened then he'll be under the impression that you either don't care that he did that or you don't mind him doing it again.Honestly though OP,I think you got your answer the first time he ditched you. Those are not the actions of a guy that wants a serious relationship with you, in fact those aren't even the actions of a guy that's really that into you.You need to find out where you stand,so you need to talk to him. And don't worry about looking needy or putting him under pressure, none of those apply because at the moment you're actually the opposite and no offence but you're kind of acting like a doormat. Seriously he ditched you once no explanation, you gave him a free pass to start all over again because you really like him but that free pass is also another opportunity to hurt you because you didn't call him out on it. You can't let people do those kind of things, you can't let him think that's an acceptable thing to do to you or that you don't mind that he did that because you do mind and if you pretend you didn't mind then you'd be lying.At the moment it's all him, he is in complete control here and you are powerless to stop him walking away again because you have not taken any kind of initiative nor sought any kind of explanation. You need to protect yourself and you need to find out where you stand. You can't just leave everything up in the air and hope things will work out the way you want them to. You have to take a bit of control and talk to him. Find out what's what, find out why he ditched you and whether the same reasons still apply because if they do he will do it again. You need to know.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010): I think he is afraid of commitment. Ask him what is going on. Don't be afraid. I like this guy alot and I always lose my chances in talking to him about it. I had a lot of chances too. I wish I could just talk to him about having a crush on him, I am to afraid, So don't be like me talk to him, ask him what is going on. If you don't you feel awful all the time, that's how I feel anyways.
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