A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:After being together for almost a year I found out my bf smoked. He had hid it well and told a few lies to cover it up. When I found out he smoked he said he'd quit when he was ready.When we moved in together he was worried the smoking would be a problem (although he has never smoked when I am around). I said it wouldn't be.He is still smoking and I am not sure but he seems to be smoking more and more. It is constantly on his breath and it is horrible. I am not sure what to do. I want to just demand he quit smoking however that might be a bit unreasonable as he did raise the issue before we moved in together and I said I'd be okay with it. On the other hand he did say he'd quit. He said when he was ready but that was almost two years ago. When will he be ready, or maybe that was code for I'd like to quit but I never will?
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male
reader, Royofthe Rovers  +, writes (16 April 2007):
 Being a smoker myself I can tell you that he wont be ready until he feels its time to give it up.
I have gone through stages of promising myself to quit and then never do, but at this present time I find myself smoking for the wrong reasons, bored, something to do with my hands etc...
Unfortunatly you cant force this upon him, it is a dirty habit and smokers know this!! He has to be ready to quit.
If I was in his shoes and I loved someone truly I would seriously consider it. being on the otherside of someone elses smoke is awful, and that is coming from a smoker.
Dont back him into a corner with the pressure to stop, coz that wont work. he will have to see the advantages to quitting himself and have the motivation to go with it.
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