A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So I have this friend I've known for a few years. We're constantly in and out of one another's lives and most of our relationship is on the phone. I have a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend but we do a lot of flirting and seem to love tlking about having sex with one another. (That's how playfully we are.) We'll have two hour conversations once every month then he'll pull back for a few days and won't say anything to me. Then next thing I know my phone is going off and it's him being playful again. One minute he's hot the next he's cold. (typical virgo guy huh)If we're suppose to be friends why off and on. He'll let me in then draw back. He's constantly telling me I'm one of the coolest girls he's ever met and we have a lot in common.What's with the mixed signalsI'm confused!!!!!!!!!
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female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (2 January 2009):
 A few thoughts come to mind. It could be that he feels safe flirting with you because you have a boyfriend. He may well be attracted to you but not even admit it himself. It is possible that he feels you are not attracted to him in that way.
Do you like him like that? Do you want something more with him? I think it is possible that if you try to get something more he will draw way back.
I think the thing to do is to continue flirting with him and if there ever is an opportunity to talk about the situation, do so. Don't create the opportunity though as that may be premature and see above, he will draw way back.
Go slow.
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