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Whats with my husband saying the things he says to me?

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Question - (31 January 2018) 5 Answers - (Newest, 3 February 2018)
A female United States age 41-50, *alling2peices79 writes:

I don’t understand why my husband says things that he says example :

I tell him I’m running to the store after giving me that yeah right look he says ok. I’m gone 30 min and he texts stuff like. Having fun or what are you killing the cow. Or I know your with your boyfriend. Then when I get home he ignore me all night and in the morning kisses me bye before he leaves and acts like nothing happened. It did happen all the shifty things he said to me happened what’s his deal

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 February 2018):

Honeypie agony auntI agree FULLY with Billy B here.

Unless you have cheated in the past there is ABSOLUTELY no reason for him to do this. And IF you did cheat in the past then this is not working, because HIS actions shows that he can't/won't move on, he wants to continue to "punish" you.

And can I ask.... Why on EARTH do you need "permission" to run to the store?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (2 February 2018):

aunt honesty agony auntHave you gave him a reason to not trust you? You need to give us more information so that we can offer more advice.

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A male reader, Billy Bathgate United States +, writes (2 February 2018):

Your husband is controlling and insecure. What he is doing is conditioning you to respond to his commands. He text you at the store so you hurry home. When you get home he gives you the silent treatment until the next day. This will go on until he has worn you down to the point that you will begin asking his permission to go anywhere or do anything. It is classic controlling behavior.

The question you need to ask yourself is why you put up with someone who treats you this way. You can confront him but he will brush it off by either saying he’s just joking or calling you crazy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2018):

When a partner is jealous without cause it often means they have done the very thing they are worried about at some time in the past or present. Show him love, do things together, and keep an eye on him too.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2018):

Why don't you be direct and ask him. No one here can tell you what your husband is thinking, or what he's implying. Maybe he's just teasing you; or simply letting you know he's keeping an eye on you in-case you're up to something. Maybe you talk in your sleep?

You're not up to anything. Are you? Have you been in the past?

If not, insist he cut it out. You don't like what he's implying; and even if it's a joke, it's a horrible joke.

Ask him if he's up to something and masking it by pretending to be keeping an eye on you? Tell him that makes you suspicious of what he's up to. That's called modifying the behavior. Turn it around, and he'll back-off; or he might look guilty. You did say he ignores you all night.

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