A
male
age
36-40,
*enmush
writes:me and my girlfriend split up a few days ago, and now i have a full on crush with one of my girl mates. ive know this girl mate for 2 years she use to date one of my friends but we are both single now, her n her partner split up the same day as me n my girlfriend did. i have realli fallen for her agen i did use to fancy her ages ago n i do even more, wut can i do or say to make her realise???
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female
reader, allie w.  +, writes (15 September 2008):
I have been in a similar situation, so here's advice from a girl's point of view: Just go for it! I had a really great guy friend that I had a huge crush on, and I kind of suspected he felt the same way about me. However, nothing ever happened because I was in a serious relationship. Despite all this, one day my guy friend just came out and very bravely, very respectfully told me that he had feelings for me, although he understood that I had a boyfriend and he wouldn't pressure me. Well, not being single at the time I did have to turn him down, but let me tell you what a turn-on it was to have a guy be straightforward and honest! He put himself in a vulnerable position and was a man about it and I respect him for that. If you suspect that your girl friend likes you, she will surely appreciate a straight approach after possibly months of wondering about you.
One further piece of advice: Just because I say go for it doesn't mean do it now. You both just got out of relationships, and are probably very vulnerable right now. In fact, your crush on your girl mate just might be your mind's way of distracting you from thoughts of your ex. If you really thing you could have something with this girl, I would wait until you are certain you are over your ex so as to not make her your rebound. Likewise, you want to make sure SHE is over HER ex as well. It would be a shame for a girl you like so much to use you to get over -- or get back at -- her ex. Also, you should probably decide if dating this girl is worth possibly losing your friend (her ex). That aside, the waiting period could be a good thing, too. There's nothing wrong with a little pent-up sexual tension between two willing singles. Good luck!
A
female
reader, starismine1 +, writes (10 September 2008):
 I would contact her and ask her out on a date. Yes, it's that simple.
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