A
female
age
51-59,
*ria Ana
writes:I need help.I am the mother of three children, all grown up. My husband died unexpectedly when I was pregnant with the last one, nineteen years ago. Although I had my share of relationships over the years, none was good enough to make me settle down again.Last month I visited my husband's old town and I stayed in his brother's house. He had a crush on me since we were very young and we were going to the same university together. It was through him that I met my late husband. It was never anything physical between us but when we met last month, he kissed me and things went out of control...He is divorced and has a girl younger than my children.I don't know what to do. What would my kids say about this? They love their uncle, they visited almost every year. Will they be disappointed? Should I pursue this relationship or I should let it die?Thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Brunel  +, writes (27 March 2010):
On another note are you musical ?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2010): we wish you happiness also. Keep us posted, :) mal
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A
female
reader, aria Ana +, writes (22 March 2010):
aria Ana is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your prompt answers.
The children are rarely home, he doesn't live close, not even in the same country, so there is enough time to think about it, although I already made my mind. I will give us a chance. The dice have been thrown, we just have to see how things will turn out.
Right now it's wonderful. I hope it will last.
Thank you, all, and I wish you all the happiness in the world!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2010): i dont see a problem, and i think you should see what happens. It sounds like you are very interested. the kids are grown, and this is someone they already know and like. I agree with angzw and cgrant.
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A
female
reader, Cindrella  +, writes (22 March 2010):
I think this is ok in my eyes.. but yours kids may or may not like this, I think you should talk to them - No big details or anything, just say you both have became good friends and you feel good around him and makes you happy, then say there maybe something there for more if it continues and that you want to know what there thoughts are. I'm sure they would understand and respect you for talking to them before going for it. Then you should be able to no what to do after that. Don't forget you need to be happy too!! Do whats right in your heart. I hope all goes well :)
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (21 March 2010):
I think they might be more accepting that you think. And the bonus is that the kids are already bonded with him emotionally and by the blood relation so you shouldnt have major issues (hopefully). Good luck
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A
male
reader, Brunel +, writes (21 March 2010):
I can't see why any upset that they may first have will not be overcome within a short time?
At first and foe a couple of months why say anything? Lets us just see how it develops, as who can say that it will go much futher.
That said there is no reason for you not to be happy with this man. Take your time as I guess you are emotionally vulnerable and he provides security that you have missed.
Start be all going out together fro a meal or a day at the coast!
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 I doubt it would be much more strange than your being in a relationship with anyone else who wasn't their father. As it is, I suspect even the two older children don't remember their father much. So to see their uncle as someone off-limits, not having known his as their father's brother, seems unreasonable. If you think there is potential for a strong relationship, pursue it.
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