A
female
age
36-40,
*rmrtnz
writes:hellomy ex and i been broken up for about 2 weeks now and sunday night i went to his house we talked..he basically told me that we're still young and that hes not ready to commit yet.then he said i'd be wasting my time if i waited for him..but i kno him, ive been with him for a year and a half and lived with him for six months and i feel like he was jus sayin that so he wouldnt get soft..i feel like he just wants to do his own thing without commitment..my family says he's seeing someone else or talking to someone else, but when we broke up the first time he told me he was when i asked him.but when i brought it up he told me he's not and that he would tell me if he was..now here's the thing...before i went over there i had this gut feeling that things were going to go good but they didnt go as i had hope they would, but when i left i was hurt and sad but my gut feeling was still there.it was telling me that ya were broken up but were not completely done...something inside me is telling me that we may be broken up for now but were still going to be together...my family keeps insisting that he's seeing someone but i dont think he is...i honestly think that he's just out there doing his thing. ya he may be talking to other girls but i dont think its anything serious..im his first real girlfriend that he ever truly loved who lived with him at his parents house and got an apartment with...my family says its my heart fooling my mind...but when a relationship is truly done and over with wouldnt you be able to feel it?..see and while i was leaving i didnt feel that at all..i still felt the same way when i drove to his house and i stll feel it now...is my heart really misleading me?or should i leave this door open and give each other our space so we can both grow and mature a lil more?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (30 January 2008):
 Nobody can foretell the future. As long as there is some breathe left , there is still hope. You can still be good friends if he does not want commitment.
Just enjoy each day as it comes and leave those commitment issues by the roadside. Wait till when the time is ripe.
Don't take those words to heart. Sometimes it appears more serious than we thought.,Just leave those problems or differences aside and enjoy each other.
Stay away from commitment issues for the time being.
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (30 January 2008):
 Correction: In my response below, I meant to say, "Young folks your age usually do NOT like to hear these old fashioned notions," but we seem to have no way to go back and correct mistaken wording. I do try to reread my posts carefully but goofs still slip by. DoubleM
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (30 January 2008):
I think he has possibly gained a bit more maturity than you have and really has come to the realization that commitment at least deserves more time and age.
Young folks your age usually do like to hear these old fashioned notions because they are absolutely convinced that they are sooooooo in love, but some things are truths of the ages.
Your final paragraph shows some good thought. Give it space for now, date around yourself a bit, let some good amount of time to pass and start trying to realize how long your life will hopefully be and who knows . . . maybe someday you two may hookup again. Best wishes girl. Your adult life has only begun.
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