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What to do about his porn habit?

Tagged as: Dating, Pornography, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 February 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 17 February 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am currently engaged and I am about 7 months into this relationship. I also am pregnant, but even that doesn't mess with the way I feel about the "porn" issue. I was raised in the country and never believed in looking at another person, whether it was a model or some girl on the internet. If you're with someone you're with that person only you shouldn't need to look at another person. Well last night I was really sick and my fiance gave me my birthday gift. Instead of me getting on it he did and he puts a picture of a nude girl on my background from boobtube. I need advice on what to do. I confronted him about it but he says he's just a guy and I told him that we are just friends until he can prove that he really truly loves me.

View related questions: engaged, fiance, porn, the internet

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (17 February 2009):

Has the whole porn issue not come up before engagement and you getting pregnant?

You've left this a bit late to talk about with him since you are now stuck with him, at least as the mother of his child, for the next 25 years.

The fact you have effectively dumped him, sends a pretty clear message and as long as your definition of "just friends" doesn't include carrying on exactly as you are but with no sex, then he should do some serious thinking over the next day or two as you ignore his calls and refuse to see him.

he has to decide whether he can be with a girl that is THIS uptight about him looking at other women. I mean, do you get annoyed if he goes past billboards? Or is it just a case of him not going on 18+ websites?

You need to tell the guy what you expect from him as your husband. You don't seem to have done this before agreeing to marry each other so now would be a good time. If he thinks he can be that guy then great. If not then it's his loss.

Good Luck!! xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009):

Ive never been with a guy that doesnt like porn or look at pictures its very normal even for girls. It doesnt mean he doesnt love you he just enjoys to look. You should be happy hes just looking and not cheating give him some slack if you keep treating him like that you will push him away.

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