A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: We're just hitting our one yr mark and he's going to be on holiday visiting family. His ex of 15 yrs and FWB up until we started dating lives near his family. They have always visited and/or hooked up over the holidays. I'm scared to death his very flirty ex will try something. He hasn't given me any reassurance other than "we're just friends". I've heard that before from 2 other guys I've loved in the past and they both ended up cheating with the ex. What do I do? I can't sleep and I cry worrying about history repeating itself. Help!!
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flirt, his ex, on holiday Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (28 November 2011):
I agree if you are dating a year why aren't you going with him?
what has HE done specifically to make you think he might cheat?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2011): I would be there if it weren't for my work schedule.
As for his history - trustworthy with me but while he was with the LTGF, he fell in love with his BF/coworker. That's what freaks me. The GF broke up with him. The BF did not feel the same, so he lost both in one week.
He says the exGF and him were friends before they started dating and being friends is easy for them. BUT they were FWB for a while after they broke up. Plus she keeps in contact with him and wants to visit - he's curbed most of that with her due to me feeling uncomfortable about it.
Thank you both for your answers.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2011): Thank you Aunt Honesty, he did invited me to go but my work schedule won't permit it. Its so hard to trust when you've been crushed before. I also found out from him that at one point he fell in love with his BF while he was with his LT partner. That also scares me that he doesn't have the best boundaries when it comes to female "friends".
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (28 November 2011):
I guess there is nothing that you can do about this. Either you trust him or you don't. Why not suggest that you spend the holidays with him at his family? I guess you just need to talk to him about how worried you are about this. That is all you can do. But just remember that just because you had two people do that to you before doesn't mean that he will be the same as them. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2011): Why aren't you going?
That would clam your fears and help you relax and enjoy the holidays?
You both could get a hotel room and make it a weekend of play. ;)
Going to need more to go on in regards to your relationship history- facts to assess if the Current BF is a trustworthy man.
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