A
female
age
41-50,
*b6471
writes:Do I trust my husband? I really do have trust issues when it comes to my husband. I don't want to leave my guard down, I guess to protect myself. My husband is always texting, all the time. Constantly checking his texts. The other night I was setting the alarm, when his phone when off. I tried to stop the music, it wouldn't stop. It said downloading picture, then asked for a secret code. I told him to enter code and show me. He kept asking why? Then showed me, but wouldn't let me hold the phone.I think I saw him erase something. About a year ago I saw his phone going off, then looked and saw a Woman's picture, then her naked.I was gonna end my marriage but when I called that women she said she didn't know husband and she has her photos on websites. He also had her number on his contacts. What should I do
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female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (24 December 2010):
 you say he is always texting and reading texts. who texts him? has he got a lot of friends that you know of? is he happy to leave his phone in a room with you? does he have a code that is needed to unlock his phone keypad? if you look in his texts does his inbox and outbox look emptier than it should do for someone who is seeming to receive and send lots of messages? maybe he just likes porn and these are not women that he knows personally. trust is such a fragile thing isnt it? its very easy to wreck trust and very very difficult to regain it! and he is doing nothing to earn your trust while he behaving like this. do you suspect him of affairs or sex with other women? like does he get to spend much time away from you? you need to tell him once and for all that you do not like whats happening. i believe you cannot and shouldnt try to change someone to fit how you want them to be. if you have to do that, then you are simply with the wrong person.this reminds me very much of the situation with my niece and her ex husband. he gave her YEARS of this behaviour. they eventually split up (coz he had an affair with 'a friend'). my niece is now with someone else and couldnt be happier. she wishes she had not wasted so many years of her life with the ex-husband. xx
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