A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:So I'm talking to a guy and I've found he tends to tell small lies, for instance, today he went to a car show and he said his phone was going to die soon so I told him I would talk to him later so he could save his battery for the last little while of the ride home, but a few minutes later he puts a few videos on his snapchat story and he is clearly home and snapchat takes up a lot of battery so I doubt his phone would have enough battery to post them. I don't mind if he doesn't feel like texting then or wanted to spend time with his brothers but I was a bit hurt by the lie. What do I do about the little lies? We are still kinda fresh in the talking phase (we talked before but it quickly ended and he asked for another chance) and I don't want to get into an argument or accuse him. I'm just not very happy with the fibs.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2016): dear fifteen year old,being two years older than i realised could make quite a difference in how you feel about this guy and he could be keeping you on the back burner because he knows you will be sixteen soon and that of course implies there is a whole lot more on offer..I hope you really are attracted to him in a genuine kind of fifteen year old way but be cautious because you dont want to be a notch on the belt.I think your guy may not be as invested in the idea of a relationship as much as you are and i expect he has been filled with dire warnings and early responsibilities of fatherhood by his caring family.It is nice that he aspires to do well at school and achieve good grades and I hope you also remember to plan your future.As for his little white lies I think he is trying to look cool but that is a little insensititve to you if you are trying to establish a caring kind of relationship because cool for him is not the same as cool for you, but if you think of a situation where you wouldnt want to tell the full details to him you might understand why he does it.if , for example you were shopping for new undies with a friend and just picked out something particularly pretty and feminine and lacy ,yet practical and he phoned up and asked "what are you doing right now?" you might feel inclined to tell him a little less than the truth, so you might say "umm..Im just picking up some groceries?" whilst standing in the store holding something lacy and pretty."oh what are you getting then.""nothing much just a bit of spaghetti.""Oh I love spaghetti ..how about i come over in half an hour for a quick bite."You see it could get very muddled so perhaps he has the same problem.Maybe he has a brother that teases him or a dad that listens in or a mum thats about to yell"son , clean yourr room and get that dirty laundry to me now.."So he tells you a battery fib rather than the embarrassing truth,Its early days so maybe its just not worth worrying about the hows and whys and give yourself a little more time to know him better and take it slow and keep your expectations on the low.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (1 February 2016):
 I think he's just being a kid and being super lazy. Having to tell the girl he's talking to that he doesn't really want to talk all the time is a problem.
I'd back off and assume he has to grow up a bit before trying to "do" something about his fibs. Which you can't.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm actually 15 lol
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2016): Dear thirteen year old just kick this guy to the kerb. It doesnt matter what your friend says ...this lad is no good for you.Every time he tells a new porkie he is toying with your emotions and it gives him the opportunity to claim you are desparate for him.Their is absolutely no necessity for you to have a boyfriend at thirteen unless you are planning on having a big phat wedding at sixteen.This is not an arranged marriage by your parents is it and you dont want to be dragged kicking and screaming to the alter do you.Ok maybe im just upgrading the whole thing for you so you can see the funny side.But seriously you are not planning on being a child bride are you?Nope, nor is he.He is not mature enough to really talk to you , he is being no more attentive than the mirror.If you wink at the mirror it will wink back at you wont it?So here are the perfect words to take the pressure off you.You say, or text because he can show it to his mates thereby proving that a girl was once interested in him:"you are a fantastic friend and i really have liked you ...but as we are both young I think we should concentrate on making new friends and getting to know new people..so I am sorry I cant be your girlfriend and call you up so much or date you ...but you will always be like a brother to me."He will probably be as relieved as if he was finally given permission to no longer wear the xmas jumper granny knitted for him, but he may also say "but we can go to the cinema just as friends now and again ,or swimming, skateboarding etc."And you can literally go just as friends no more no less.And do those things with all your female friends and new guy friends as well.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2016): I would just sit him down and have a talk. I swear it works and you might even come closer together
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe stopped talking before because he said he wasn't focused in school and he was having a lot problems with a certain friend of his, this was a few months ago. He then asked me for another chance recently and my friend who was with me believes he is being genuine.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (1 February 2016):
The fibs might be a way to get you to back off for a bit.
Why did the talking end so quickly before?
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