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What should I do about my friend's smoking?

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Question - (22 May 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 22 May 2011)
A female Australia age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I recently found out recently that my friend is a smoker. Apparently she has been since the age of 13. Where I live it's the law that you have to be eighteen to smoke. She's still only sixteen. I'm usually alright with keeping her other secrets, but this is one I'm having trouble with. It's the law, not just some stupid crush. I have no idea whether I should tell someone or not, cause if I don't, it's breaking the law, and if I do it's betraying her trust.

Help!

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (22 May 2011):

chigirl agony auntActually, she's not the one breaking the law as much as she's ruining her own body. The person who is really breaking the law is the person who gives/buys her the cigarettes. Do you know who that is?

Police do not have the resources to deal with every teenager who smokes under-age, or every teenager who drinks. But I know in some cases the police bring teenagers in to a meeting with them if they have been drinking or doing drugs. However I am not sure how often this occurs, if your local police have the resources, and if smoking is serious enough for the police to even bother. Lets face it, teenagers are doing worse things out there, like getting high or having unprotected sex, running away, you name it.

Instead of thinking that your friend is doing something illegal, try a different approach. This is HER problem after all. Tell her it is not cool, you disapprove of it. She's allowed to do as she pleases, that she's only ruining her own body by this, and that you are uncomfortable with keeping this a secret. You don't have to rat out on her, but if someone asks, or brings it up, you aren't going to keep it a secret. Plain and simple.

If she ditches you as a friend over this then she's a snob. Good friends tell each other when they're being stupid. I hope she's mature enough to understand the importance of having such good friends around.

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