A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: What is the easiest way to dump someone you've been with for over two years? I've tried before but I hate making people feel bad. You have no idea what it does to me. But I have to do it, I'm miserable. I do love him, but it's just not the same anymore. I don't feel loved like I used to. I've gone as far as being so desperate as to dump him by phone or even text. I know this is low, but I don't think I can do it otherwise. I get stressed even thinking about it. What's your opinion about this. I know it's bad, but I just don't know what I can do. I seriously think I can't do it in person. Do I have any alternatives? Or am I stuck with him.
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female
reader, kayla20 +, writes (29 July 2009):
Texting or phoning him to dump him is the easy way out and in some way disrespectful. You have to do it face to face. I mean it’ll upset him but he'll appreciate you seeing him when you do it. Just sit him down, don’t think about it and just say it’s not working anymore. You don’t want to upset him and you love him as a person but are not in love with him anymore and you’ve been unhappy for quite some time and you’d like to go on a break to think about a few things. In that way you are telling him that you’re unhappy, giving him a challenge. If he wants it to win you back and make you happy but then you have the alternative to think whilst being away from him for a few weeks or months to find out if you feel happier without him. It doesn’t matter how you dump someone, its always better in person. He'll respect you for that and then hopefully it won’t be left on bad terms. However it will be upsetting for both of you but once it’s done the relief will be with you. Good luck.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (29 July 2009):
You are not stuck with him.
I thought that about my boyfriend when I was 17. I loved him but I was in no way "in love" with him anymore and was miserable.
All you have to do is just see him, say "We need to talk." and then tell him, you don't feel the same and you don't want to be with him any more.
Yes it will be horrible but you have to get it over with.
Trust me, once it is done and you walk home, you will feel so free and amazing.
And having done it once you will never EVER get yourself in that state again. You'll know the signs to watch out for and you'll be able to split up much earlier so it's not as hard.
Just keep thinking "won't it be great to never feel trapped like this again?"
Listen to a song by Lilly Allen called "I could say" (or read the lyrics online) after you have done it.
Good Luck!! xx
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