A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Example: you send a tweet or a social media message or a text to someone and when yu meet in person it may be: hard to make conversation a little awkward maybe they may be cold or seem uninterested why cant written communication that is warm and ok.. translate to meeting in person? it's harder in person I know, you are dealing with a real person/emotions/feeling etc,! ways to overcome this? why does it, do you think, feel more comfortable via written/online word, then you meet up, (am talking meeting with friends, family and people you know, as well as meeting people for the first time) and it is like...OK this is awkward.. we chated online now we cant converse! appreciate no hate please. Addit: am talking people generally, not specifically about me! why is it easier online etc than reality? we can get so disappointed, we may build up what we think may happen..at times how to not do this as people and so have more success? its so much easier to tweet, text, instaGram Fb etc '"nice photo" or "nice to see you" " or look forward to seeing you" than say it..in person it is not said and its like...ok now what.? I am "old enough" to know life without phones and I am quieter and shy in groups but at times Im very assertive and.. am also "able" to talk to many people of all ages and personalities, my job involves working with and relating to to many different, people.thanks and please don't be nasty, it is just a question..
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 July 2015):
 Practice.
Many people are SIMPLY forgetting how to small chat. Why? Because we do in a way (like Janniepeg calls it) live in a virtual world.
When chatting online with someone you don't know, YOUR imagination fills in the blanks. That is why people often get this whole "HIGH" from chatting with people online. And often you will find that SOME people don't realize that there is another "equally awkward" person at the other end, so they find it way easier to "fake" confidence.
A tweet for instance is what? 140 letters? You HAVE to compress what you want to say, where as in person you can be left to "flounder" a little (verbally).
Funny enough, I find it MUCH easier to talk to people in person than online/text/etc. Because I KNOW if they are there to MEET up with me (and mine) they WANT to talk to me and enjoy the company. A little awkwardness is fine. It goes away in time. What I do find HARD is to talk to someone who doesn't WANT to be there.. but shows up out of some sort of obligation (like family).
BUT... online... people LIKE to maintain a facade. Whether it's on Facebook, Pininterst, twitter etc - they don't want to come off as awkward or tell people to go away. Social media doesn't REALLY require a lot of effort. Clicking "LIKE" on a post, picture or quote is NOT a conversation about the subject - but it's seen as such. "OH you like apples too!".
In person you DO have to make an effort. And while you may have liked the other person's post on "apples" it may not be a great subject to sit and chat about over a cup of coffee or glass of wine.
I started my post by saying practice. I'm serious. PRACTICE your small talk skills. I bet you do it already to some extend at work, but it's easier to slip into a "work-persona" when at work, than a "conversationalist" when meeting people, even some you know.
And don't forget you CAN always bring up one of the topics shared online, like the "apple" one I mentioned. (example) - it can be an icebreaker and segue into other topics. After all with people you have on social media you have access to a LOT of what's going on in there lives - which should make it easier to find topics, I'd think.
Personally, I'd say GET off the social media and spend time with people IN person.
My neighbor thinks it funny that I will WALK over to their house and ask to borrow their ride-on-lawnmower instead of just shooting a text, or just go borrow it. BUT I was raised with the notion that even if someone TOLD you, hey it's OK to just take the lawnmower, you still use manners and ASK. We usually have a good chat each time anyways, so it's nice.
They are JUST people too. No need to worry too much about being awkward.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (7 July 2015):
 Because many people don't really want to meet up in person, unless it's business related and can help them in careers. We live in a world of virtual reality. The easy access to the internet does not mean people suddenly became more sociable. I found that technology is shoved down people's throat that they have no choice but to use it, so you don't become outdated and lose touch with the world. When you are online you don't have to make effort to look nice. People can text each other while sitting on their toilets, lying in beds, or in the car waiting for the lights. It's done very quick and it gives the impression that you care.
If there's a chance that being in person does not feel awkward, you've found a true friend indeed. The key is not to let it get to you. Keep moving on until you find friends who say what they mean, and are literal about their intentions.
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