A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I just want to be open about how I feel about this girl, I honestly loved this girl with all my heart and everything. Now its been over a year and a half since we have broken up, she has had a few relationships in this time we have remained friends during this time. Now during this time I have realized she is not the same girl, she is into partying and different things and well I am the opposite. Our personalities differ on that level, and also I find I make her seem better then she actually is, as my friend said "I painted her better then she is". I sorta believe that, but in some sense I don't know what to believe. But who she is, the artist, the fun loving girl, the similarities with life/interests what I am attracted to is in this girl. What is important if you are in a relationship? Personality or who the person is? I don't know, and really I don't understand what I feel for this girl since I have been told so much about what to feel for this girl and how much wrong she has done (yes she has done wrong). I don't want to hold on to the old feelings and just enjoy my time with this girl and if we get back together big deal, if not big deal. I feel like each time I tell my friends she was flirty and how she asked me three times if I was dating a certain girl, they say I am looking to far into things. Whats the right thing to do? I live once, I just want to be happy and not hold anything against this girl, but friends and family make it hard.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Dataluke  +, writes (17 January 2011):
 I have been through this exact thing, and I'm sorry to say that there is no correct answer, its all down to interpretation.
You need to stop listening to other people and make up your mind about her.
The most important thing in a relationship is what you feel, which can have everything to do with personality and what a person is like or nothing to do with it at all.
I can't tell you what to do, I can only say that you must decide what is best for you.
All the best, Dataluke
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