A
female
age
36-40,
*issSummers
writes:Hi! I like a guy. He doesn't talk a lot about past or current relationships and stuff like that so, I don't know if he has a girlfriend or if he likes someone. I'm trying to find out about that.But if he does have a girlfriend, should I step back and forget about him? Should I get over him and follow my path? This is killing me, 'cause there is the strong possibility he has someone (because of some "misterious" phonecalls we've seen him doing and some other details...) and I don't know how i'm going to react...i mean, i don't know that yet and i'm already freaking out!Can someone give me some some advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): It sounds like you need to get him to open up.
Forget all the eye contact, sutle flirting rubbish, i have a few ideas for you.
1) Do some research. you could casually talk to his mates about him and find out if he has a gf.
2)If that tactic doesnt work, say something funny like, 'So, "his name", hows your love life?' Then he has to admit whats going on. Trust me, it always works.
3) If all else fails, just ask him!
It also sounds like you are thinking to much about what will happen, maybe you need to get closer to other people instead of just focusing on one lad you like. Remember, not everything works out.
A
female
reader, MissSummers +, writes (21 June 2008):
MissSummers is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFirst of all, thank you for the advice.
Criticism is always welcome, when it is constructive (important point here).
The thing is: he is my friend, I've know him for 6 months or so (not much, I know). Yesterday we went out to eat something, the other day we studied together, we talk a lot at college and in the msn. We also talked about having a drink one of this days. But he is a misterious person, he doesn't talk a lot about his thoughts and his feelings (he is kind of opaque if you know what i mean).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2008): Why are you freaking out over a guy you barely know and have ever been out with before? This intensity alone will scare him off....just try getting to know him casually first as a friend, and then he will tell you what you want to know. If you then find out he is single, if he really wanted to ask you out, most likely he would do so on his own, especially if you gave him some encouragement and I am sure you know how to do that.
If you do find he has a girlfriend, then absolutely back off, he won't respect you otherwise, if you really want to date him, wait your turn and be respectful of the other woman in his life, she didn't do anything to you to make you want to steal her boyfriend did she?
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (21 June 2008):
 Next time you are around him do some light flirtatious gestures, like eye contact, or some touches and see if its reciprocated atal. Also like Flirty says drop it in conversation somewhere that you are single and therer is this guy you like. If you do find out that he has a partner i would be inclined to step back and refrain from going after him. But if he is single then by all means go for it.
Hope it goes well for you x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2008): Well nxt time your with him just drop in conversation and tell him that your single and i really like this guy but you dont no if he is single then he might get a HINT and end up talking bout his own luv life GUD LUK XXXXXX
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