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female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I have a big dilemma. I need advice on this,please.I'm trying to make my life better at the last 10 years, making things work, reach goals, etc.Making my marriage better, better mother, losing weight.Getting ahead in business, but I m getting nowhere.Seriously, it seem to get worse, not better.I try to tackle the problems one by one, but they never seem to improve.I wonder, maybe I didn't do enough, or didn't do it right.But while I try to deal with one thing, another one comes in, and it just never ends, and I feel like going nowhere. And most of the times feels hopeless.And ending up, with a dysfunctional marriage, unhappy children, overweight, and so on.I really want to hear what do you think I'm doing wrong, and how can I get out of it? Thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): Do fewer things. I would prefer to do one thing well in stead of many things badly. When that is going well, try two. Even if you do zillions of things badly you have accomplished nothing.Check with your doctor about hypothyroidism and the possibility of SSRI antidepressants or even mild amphetamines or other stimulants (Ritalin).Dumber people than you can do it, you can too.
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female
reader, x.Helen.x  +, writes (10 June 2009):
 Every night write down a few things you are grateful for. It will help you see that your life is not that bad and encourage you to look on the bright side of life.
Have you considered Volunteering? The best way to put your troubles into perspective is by helping others. If you like animals you could volunteer. in a animal shelter. If you like kids you could volunteer. at a school.
Find a hobby. e.g learning to knit or anything else your interested in
Exercise several times a week. Even if its just set of sit ups every day or a quick jog It builds feel good endorphins in you system.
If you are into reading try some self help books on changing the way you think about things. David Burns is a very good author for this.
Do something you enjoy once a week like going for a meal with friends or to the movies or simply for a walk.
Avoid alcohol it is a depressant and can bring your mood down.
Rent funny movies or read funny books. This can often life your mood. Also avoid negative/depressing movies.
Everyone questions how happy they are at every stage of their life. We are scared of making mistakes, getting it wrong and ending up miserable.
When I get low it is usually caused by a "trigger". A lyric, lack of money, a sad movie, another bill, the news, a friend’s success, disappointment and the most regular cause for me is becoming bored.
We will never truly be happy until we can accept ourselves, love our imperfections and embrace our mistakes to learn from then. We cannot go in search for happiness. It will come to us when we are content with our lives.
Im sorry I couldn’t help more but I really hope things get better for you. I wish you all the best. Good luck. x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2009): I respect your efforts and i'm sorry it's not working for you, but this is very hard to answer i'm afraid, without knowing what problems you're facing, why your children are unhappy, what diets you've tried, what support you have, what sort of relationship you have with your husband and what issues it involves, what kind of man he is and how he deals with your problems, how much free time you have, where you work and how much you enjoy it, etc. Things like this will help up to know more about what youre' possibly doing wrongly and what we could get you out of your mess.
You are welcome to share all of those things with us and we will followup with you and help how we can.
However, inveseting in a therapist may be wise so that you can personally discuss these issues with him and recieve personal advice.
Or prehaps both methods.
~SY.
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