A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a really complex situation right now. ok, I had an ex for 10months but we dated back in high school (the senior years) its been almost 2years since our break up, but during that time we'd use to flirt and always looked like we were going to get back with each other. I use to treat him like shit, and I think its probably taken its toll. I mainly gave him attitude cause he just got on my nerves, and felt that he wasn't true to himself, like trying so hard to impress. well, now he's with another girl for 4months now..but I don't know if he still thinks of me. he seems like he really likes her and im just sitting here regretting everything. I lost someone who truly cared for me, stood by me when I wasn't that nice to him. he even got got a tattoo of my intials on his hand. I just miss 'us', what used to be. or maybe I just feel this way cause i'm so used to him chasing me, and now that his found someone else I hate it?I also have a dilemma with my best guy friend. in the past he'd use to come over late at night and we'd go for walks. we talked 24/7, about anything and everything. he had a crush on me ever since highschool but he was dating someone at the time. there were many times that he wanted to break up for me..and he's officially done it twice. the first break up I ended up ignoring him for a month. the second break up which happened 2 months ago.. he asked me if I liked him and I said no. I also stopped talking to him again, and totally ignore him when I see him in uni. so our friendship has deteriorated also. I don't know what's wrong with me. I know that im attracted to females but I don't know if this is why I act like this to boys?. im pretty sure im bi but never really had a relationship with a girl. don't get me wrong though, I have had feelings for both of these guys.. but maybe for my ex it was just an insecurity? like I can't hack it that he's moved on and im no longer his pursuit. as for my besty, maybe my like for him was just of a brotherly nature. what do you guys think?, maybe I no longer want boys?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Who  +, writes (17 April 2009):
 “What do you guys think? Do I no longer want boys?”
I think you like boys all right; you like to jerk them around, play with their feelings, make them endlessly chase you only to have you spurn them.
That sounds cruel but that’s what I’m reading in your question. The two guys who were pursuing you before have gotten tired of that treatment and have moved on; this should not be a surprise to you.
You are young and had no way of knowing how you would act in your first few relationships. Now you have some experience and you should look back and ask yourself what you want out of a relationship and from a guy. If you want something different in the future you are going to have to act different.
If you want the same thing again, there are some men who will let you drag them around endlessly. I believe the term for these guys is PW’ed. Just be sure this is what you want.
And if you really do want a girl, I’m sure an opportunity will come along soon enough for you to try and see if that is what you really want.
Best of luck.
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