A
female
age
36-40,
*adea23
writes:i'm 24 years old. i have a boyfriend,J, who love me so much ! we've been dating for 4 years. my 2 years with him is so great. i knew him when we studied together in university. so we spent so much time together. but after 2 years, he's changed. i don't know why. he started to drink. he lied to me. but still our relationships remains the same. i don't want to let him go because i love him so much. for the 3rd year of our relationships,i found that he's been dating with my BFF. actually, 2 of my BFF. i donno why my friends kept this from me.they've been hiding it from me about 6 months. and when the day i knew that my boyfriends was dating with my BFF, i'm totally mad at him. i still remember that day eventhough it's been a year the shit happened.my relationships with my friends like we-do-not-know-each-other. actually, i think that my boyfriends have a mental disorder.haha. n recently i just found out that my bf is flirting with another girls.eventhough it's virtual (tagged,facebook) and i know it's just for fun, but i'm hurting.i donno what to do with him..and now we had a long distance relationships and i don't see him for 3 months. i know it's difficult having LDR...but i love him so much and i thinks he's the one for me. the men that i want to marry....and we have a lot of argument recently........
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male
reader, BigSambo  +, writes (14 January 2011):
You will show more respect for yourself if you leave him and not go back to him no matter what he does. Also you will be more careful in the future as to what kind of bf and female friends you will have when you decide to have them. Well, wouldn't you rather leave him now with less ties and heartaches later. You need to separate your feelings from the rational decision that your mind is telling you to make.Have you heard of a TRAINED CONSCIOUS? Your bf's behavior indicates that he does not have a trained sonscious, he has a scarred conscious which means he can cheat on you and come home to you all smiling and make love to you and not feel any guilty that he just cheated on you. What if he likes someone else more than he likes you and then he decides to dump you!!! Wouldn't you be hurt or feel so stupid for giving him chance after chance?The question that you need to ask yourself is why do you think you are not good enough for him?
A
female
reader, nadea23 +, writes (14 January 2011):
nadea23 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyour question and answer really freaking me out.but actually, u make me think about this relationships. i know its cliche, but 4 years with someone is really unforgettable. its hard 4 me to forget him. i love him so much and i dont have someone else. i lost my best friend..but i dont want to lost my boyfriend. it sounds stupid but its true...but his attitude really cannot be acceptable. sometimes, im too tired with this relationships. i said 10 times to leave him but i dont do it. when im trying to forget/leave him, he coax me until i forgive him..
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A
male
reader, BigSambo +, writes (13 January 2011):
Once a cheater always a cheater. Do you think you can live with a cheater for the rest of your life?I think you should dump this boyfriend of yours as well as your best female friends. They all cheated you and that is your basis for cutting off all ties with them. You got used to your bf and love him and that is normal to feel when you live with someone for 4 years, but remember that while he was with you he chose to sleep with another girl. Cheating is ground for divorce in civil court and according to most religions.Leaving him will cause pain for a while but I am sure that you will find someone better who will aprreciate you more and better. Question: How do you know what he is doing now since he is away from you? Answer: Most likely having sex with someone else.
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