A
female
age
41-50,
*arleyQuinn
writes:Could anybody offer some advice here, I'm going crazy keeping my feelings locked up!!! I am dating a guy that blows hot and cold, one minuet he's calling me sweet cheeks and telling me how amazing he thinks I am, then barley speaking to me or being very vague. Everything is on his terms, not once has he planned a lovely date, rather decided once I got to him what to do. He never comes over and stays over, he always leaves! This has been going on for 5 months. Those are the bad points! He does have lovely points too... Lots of them! Then there is this... We had a falling out over him jumping up immediately after we had, had sex and cleaning up. (Never before done, usually lays and cuddles for hours after) Anyway, I was not nice at all and he still wants to date me?!? My gosh am I confused!!! I'm falling for him as he is a lovely man and does not disrespect me, I just can't do the mixed signals anymore. ?? I don't want tell him how I feel in case it puts him off, but at the same time, I'd like to know where I stand. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, HarleyQuinn +, writes (18 January 2015):
HarleyQuinn is verified as being by the original poster of the question It's driving me crazy insane!!! I've been texting with him and had a chat on the phone today, he's such a sweetheart when it suits, even when sex isn't involved. I think he may well be afraid of commitment after his ex totally screwed him over. :/ Just my luck to wait 5 years before I'm ready to start dating and meeting Mr Hot & Cold... Bummer!!! Well I'll be seeing him again on Tuesday and I'm not sure I'll be able to hold back.
Never in all my life has a man gotten me in such a spin, or left me feeling so confused, happy, scared and excited all at once.
A
female
reader, Runaway Girl +, writes (18 January 2015):
This sounds like my guy exactly. Not sure how long you have been dating but it don't get any better.
We have been together nearly four years and nothing has changed during that time.
I am at the point of leaving as I am wasting my time I suggest you do the same.
I find that even if we have a row, he wants to make up again and forgives all that was said.
I think they know only a handful of women will date them.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2015): Sounds like he is a commitment phobe. And you know why? Well, for a start he doesn't stay over (classic sign) and sounds like he's started to up and leave straight after sex ( another sign). It sounds like he's pulling away, is that what it feels like? When things are great, I am sure they are great as he wants to be close and to keep you sweet as he is getting sex and doesn't want to give that up (he is a man after all). My betting is, he is evasive over his feelings and afraid to fall in love, so he probably does the whole pull push thing as is afraid of intimacy. Just my take. What's his background? Parents still together? Or did they seperare when young? Unfortunately, if I am right, there is no fixing these types and you are better off with someone where you know where you stand, you are worth so much more then to be treated this way sweetie. Xx
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