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What do guys actually like/look for in a girl?

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Question - (3 December 2007) 12 Answers - (Newest, 19 December 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

What do guys actually like/look for in a girl?

Does it really appeal to a guy when a girl cakes on makeup? Loads of foundation and blush, and black eyelinered eyes?

Do they care of a girl is on a diet? Do they care if she is a size 8 with a flat tummy, or a 12 with a little podge?

Is personality important? Does it matter if a girl is fake or superficial?

What if a girl is stunning with a crap personality? Or not so beautiful but has an amazing personality?

What if a girl has a crooked bumpy nose, or a pointy witchy chin?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2007):

There's a few people out there who like just about any characteristic that you could possibly think of. But the majority of guys/girls still prefer the common stereotypical things in a mate.

The caked-on makeup is a personal preference thing. Just about every guy I know would rather the girl err on the side of too little than too much. Looking good is just an arms-race. The heavy makeup can work wonders from across the room at the bar even if it's not a great advantage up close & personal.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2007):

To the person below - get a grip!

Alot of beautiful girls, and indeed guys, have hollow personalities because they feel their looks can more than compensate and they don't have to make the effort with a personality.

Not all obviously. It's not a notion dreamed up by plain girls...Christ.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I've not had a bad experience, I just wanted to hear from the guys, out of curiosity, what they look for in a girl etc.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

My point exactly.

It is said that the kind of people that you date will be simular to the person

your going to marry. If a guy chooses always to date the model type with the gorgeous hair, body,but has a hollow personality, Then chances are he may end up marring that girl. Sadly without realizing it, the personality of the girl and

guy make up TRUE love and a real everlasting relationship.

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A female reader, sexy_saz666 United Kingdom +, writes (6 December 2007):

It seems like you have had a bad experience with this...

In all honesty No it does not matter in the slightest all the lads i have met seem more focused on personality although there are a few stupid ones that go for the trophy gf a little size turn to the side disappear and all you can see is her bright orange glow foundation...sorry rambiling....but they even come around to its personality that wins them over xx hope i helped

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A female reader, michel Slovenia +, writes (3 December 2007):

If they know what they re looking for i would hang myself on the wrapper!! A real Man,who has no problem with himeslf and his masculinity , would like probably:Good looking and in addition intelligent, witty and authentic woman Who he will not require r want to change but to please her and make her feel good. But most of them unfortunatly are Clingy and dont know where are sailing. So You could see a guy that experiance erection on SExy -confideant woman But having no courage and afraid of himself and his masculinity will say that he likes Ordinary,Dumb Woman.

So basicly, They like Sexy, Good looking, Witty,intelligent, confident and full of vitality and zest for life woman.

And a real man would appreciate that caracteristic of a completely developed Woman, the others will only try to make her down.

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A male reader, Dazzerg United Kingdom +, writes (3 December 2007):

Dazzerg agony auntSpeaking personally, personality is very important and I think one thing that is often neglected is the connection between personality and looks; to me somebody with a crap personality would struggle to look stunning. I would go with the loyalty, intelligence etc which bqagirl mentioned with some emotional warmth in the mix too.

Superficial girls tend to annoy me and I dont tend to view them as relationship material, i prefer depth but that is a personal preference. I think its hard to generalise with a thing like this because of course attraction is a deeply personal thing and everybody will be slightly different.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2007):

Well, people generally seek partners that feel like "lucky" catches, and everyone has their own idea of what counts, so it's all relative.

But a guy with a crooked bumpy nose probably doesn't feel lucky to get a girl with a similar issue--he wishes he'd do slightly better than he has a reason to expect.

So your goal is to make guys genuinely lucky, according to their own idea of what counts, while still feeling genuinely lucky yourself to have caught them.

Guys do generally like seeing that you understand your own potential for beauty and that you play to its strengths in ways that are contextually appropriate.

They like when you admire them, which makes them feel special, without fawning over them, which makes you seem beneath them. They like when you can talk to them about the things they're interested in. They like when you share the same relationship goals.

That's about it, really. Other aspects of your personality matter a lot more after the first six months.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2007):

As far as physical appearance I don't really like makeup because to me it's like a mask and I want to see the real woman. For size I don't care one way or another about diets as long as she is healthy. A little podge is fine with me. I only get concerned if her weight is in the extremes of too thin or too fat, again health is more important than size.

Her personality is very important to me. No matter how pretty a woman is her looks will fade but who she is (her soul and mind) will last. I would rather be with someone who had real beauty (the kind that comes from inside) over someone merely pretty (only appears good).

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2007):

No not all guys like girls with a lot of makeup. But let me tell you, I don't know where you are from, but I have noticed regional differences in men's tastes here in America. Like for instance, I used to live in nyc, and used to get so much attention from guys it wasn't even funny. Then I moved to florida and I barely get hit on by guys. I have also noticed that in nyc, guys are more drawn to natural looking ladies whereas here in florida, the faker the better. So it really depends where you live, I guess.

But that aside, generally in my experience, guys usually like me because I am really fun to be around, I am very romantic, confident, sexy, intelligent, open minded, have lots of dignity. I am sweet and caring. I show guys just the right amount of flirting and attention without overstepping his or my boundaries. Alot of stuff.

Its just a perfect balance of alot of different factors. And the more you put yourself out there and date around a bit, the more intuitive you will become about what guys like and don't like.

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A female reader, bqagirl2692 United States +, writes (3 December 2007):

bqagirl2692 agony auntMen seek two different types of women. One they can spend the rest of their life with and one they can just have fun with for a while. If a man seeks for a long lasting relationship, they tend to be interested in women who are independent, confident, loyal, intelligent and basically have a great personality. They look for women that are strong to lift them up when they bring themselves down. A women that is willing to devote their lives to their relationship and intelligent to try and prove them wrong. Those are the basic qualities most guys look for in a long lasting relationship. Sometimes men make wrong choices and pick the wrong women to devote themselves to but everyone makes mistakes. Some guys maybe be sort of shallow and tend to only look for women for how they look but it is all a process. You have fun and experience until you find the right one.

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A female reader, CantHelpFallin United States +, writes (3 December 2007):

i'm no guy, but it really differs for each guy. my neighbour, for example, claims he wants a good christian girl, yet he tries to get the numbers from wild party girls that just look and act so fake.

a real guy can give u a much better answer--just wanted to toss in my 2 cents lol

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