| A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I am trying to understand why my boyfriend cheated on me. Not just once- but many times, with different girls. These weren't one-night stands after getting drunk, but planned dates. Why was he even with me if he was interested in all these other women? Why would someone do that? For nearly three years? So many lies... He disgusts me, really. But I find myself constantly reminding myself about what he did to keep myself angry. The only thing that would stop me from making contact. While having no contact is good, I am really tired of thinking about it all. Does anyone else know how I could just forget all of it? I did forgive everything that happened in the past- it happened, I can't change it. But I don't want to remember it anymore. I just don't understand how anyone could behave this way- I know now that he didn't care for me- forget loving me- but I wouldn't be this awful to a total stranger let alone someone I lived with!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2008): Hi,First of all realize one thing - you were faithful to him the entire time, so the problem is NOT with you. You were good. Please don't EVER undermine yourself. The problem is (don't mind my saying it) your ex-BF was a JERK! He is the typical scumbag that we good guys hate but for some reason girls really like. I don't understand women. Anyways thats another topic. Second, he cheated on you with others. But do you realize that at the same time he was cheating them? After all he did have you at the time..I don't think he would have told those other women about you while dating them. So you get my point - he was basically cheating all the women in his life - which makes him a SCUMBAG of the highest order.He had absolutely no right to make you feel responsible for any of the stuff. So please just forget about him and go on with your life. Take some time off just for yourself. Go on a trip or something. And when you are ready get back into the game and look for a "good guy" this time. One who respects you for what you are.The only thing you must take from your past is Experience not bad memories. I wish you the very best in life.Regards,25, Male, Indian
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