A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I found out about a month ago that my significant other cheated on me about six months ago. We are not married, but we have been living together for 5 years and have two little boys. About a year ago she decided to go back to school. I told her to quit her job so that she could concentrate in school and that only I would work and support the family. We have always had problems and arguments since the begining of our relationship, so nothing seemed out of the ordinary, except that I noticed that she was texting a guy from school frequently. I confronted her about it and she said that he was just a friend. She was acting a bit different with me, so I figured that she was cheating. I asked her several times but she always denied it. About a month ago a friend of ours told me that my significant other had confessed to her that she had cheated on me with the guy. I confronted her about it and she admit it, but told me that it only happened once. I didn't believe her and still don't believe her about her cheating only once. I don't trust her and I can't forgive her, but in a way I want things to work out because of our two boys. What can I do to forgive and forget?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2010): You can't forgive and forget because you don't really want to right now.
Nor should you, from what I hear. I don't think she is really sorry about anything she did except getting caught.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2010): get rid of her, its not worth it.
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A
male
reader, serenity80 +, writes (26 October 2010):
Does she want to you to forgive and forget? Is she happy in the relationship now? People don't generally cheat for no reason. Unless you really feel like she had addressed why she cheated on you, and you feel she is committed to your relationship and your children then it is not worth you trying to forgive and forget yourself because you'll always be at risk of it happening again. If she is able to demonstrate that she has learnt from her mistake and that she wants to be with you, it should make moving on with her very possible.
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