A
female
 ,
*ngelicc
writes:Well I guess we’ve broken up for the past week and a bit, but yes2day….Well early this morning it turned official. The weird thing is I was okay, no crying, no getting upset and no begging. I guess I already knew this going to happen so I did my crying, getting upset, worrying much earlier.It’s was kind of an easy break, him seemed okay it about, I was okay about it. We agreed to be friends, which I’m okay with. But I think I need to cut him out for now, don’t get me wrong I love him so much – too much, but if this is going to work I need to get out of my head there a chance for us. Well there is a chance, but if hold on to that hope I’ll move on and I need too. I always thought we’ll be together, get married, have three kids, own our own home. I guess I still do, I love him and I always will love no matter what. Starting to wish we did the own one last time thing….shame. What a waste ha-ha…. There so many things I’m going to miss about him, the way he looked at me, the way he smiled, the way he laughed, the tried to sing, the way kissed, the way he included me in things, the way he teased me and fooled around. Even the way he argued with me…lol…so much too miss. Including some explicit things I can’t mention. Lol Before I start rambling on, my question is when is it right to move on? I don’t feel like mourning the end of my relationship. I feel like moving on with my life, like I’ve done my crying, my worrying and done my being upset. So is it wrong of me to move on now, I may know what I want to do but I still have this feeling of guilt. I love him still but I can’t wait forever for him to turn around and realise we belong together. And I feel like it’s wrong to want a little happiness for now. So should I wait or move on?
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female
reader, xXxNatxXx +, writes (16 April 2006):
 I still agree that you should stay away for a while and when you feel that you are both ready tell him you want you both to stay great friends and a part of each other's lives.
As for being able to move on so you are in the stage where you have the ability to have a physical relationship again, follow your heart, keep your head up high and step over the boundary that separates you the world you are in now to life beyond.
The quicker you do so, the quicker you can enjoy the happiness you deserve.
x x x x
A
female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (16 April 2006):
Angelicc is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you both for your replies,
I want to move on not physical relationship just in to the stage of being in the ability to be in another relationship. I just don’t want to feel guilty like I’m giving up on us. I still want to be in his life and I still want him to be apart of mine but maybe I should just not include it in for awhile so I try and get over him.
We were together for about a year and four months on/off but I’ve know him for longer.
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A
female
reader, xXxNatxXx +, writes (16 April 2006):
Of course it isn't wrong for you to want a little happiness! We all do.
If you feel that by moving on you will forget that there could be a chance between you two, then that's what you should do.
You mustn't forget though, that you split up for a reason...Your ex may need more time to move on but if you do not then don't wait around.
It would be kinder (depending on how your ex feels about the split)to stay away from him for a while so that he has time and old memories to help heal the loss of you.
You only live once!
x
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A
male
reader, hp7540 +, writes (16 April 2006):
It depends on what you mean by "move on." If you are talking about strengthening the bonds you have with family and friends, to get their support; or if you are talking about getting busy and filling up your life - by all means, do so. If you are talking about jumping into a new relationship, maybe not.
It might be good to just go out and have a good time, without any serious commitment. (I'd suggest you avoid physical relations at first, as this often complicates feelings.) But it's good to remind yourself that you are fun, desirable, and can have a complete like without him. On the other hand, you owe it to yourself - and whoever you might be with next - to take a little time and process the last relationship before you jump to the next.
You didn't say how long you were together. Generally, the longer a relationship, the longer it takes before someone is fully ready to move on. Even if you don't take two years off, you should take at least some time, though, to go through a process of grieving (if not for him, then for what you thought might have been) and review. A few feelings are bound to be left over. For your sake and the new person lucky enough to have you in his life... leave your baggage behind before you get onboard the next train. Sort through what went wrong - your part and his. Work on you. Grow. Be happy. Before you meet the next person with whom you will get married, have three kids, and own a home.
Here is a link to a pretty interesting article about the grieving process for romantic relationships: http://www.soulfulliving.com/soulfulsingles/aug02soulfullove.htm Some of it you might find useful.
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