A
female
age
41-50,
*owderedheart
writes:My boyfriend and I are on a break. However we are still living together, it's awkward. We have been fighting a lot, especially in the last few months, and we have only been together for 8 months, living together for 6. Tensions were high and I had so much resentment towards him, so he said he wanted a break from me.It has been 2 weeks now, and i noticed that there has been someone he has been texting day in and day out. He works long hours so weekdays he is home, but on the weekend he has gone out, where I dont know. I don't consider us broken up, more so a break so we can figure things out. But last night he was staying late up texting someone, and he never stays up past his bedtime to text, the only time I recall him doing that was when we first met! I asked him straight up, are we broken up, or on a break? He said, "broken up, what part of that don't you understand", so i said, that ok, i thought we were on a break, which meant we were taking time to think about things to work things out, I didnt realize we were seeing other people. And he kept saying he wasn't seeing other people, but there is no other way I can explain his behavior. I have finally apologized to him, because months of me blaming him for our situation, I realize I never shifted the blame and attitude to myself, so i await his forgiveness. But it hurts a lot, i have no proof it is a girl, he doesnt hide his texting, i have tried to get a good look at the name and i couldnt see because my vision was bad lol, I dont know what to do...
View related questions:
a break, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (16 October 2012):
 On a break = we broke up, but aren't going to admit it just yet. When he's on a break he's hooking up with other women. That's what a "break" means. It means he not longer has to be faithful to you, but get to try out other women, and then if he doesn't like f-ing someone else he'll come back to you. Yay! Or not. If all he wanted was space he'd say that, he'd ask for space, for you and him to not talk for a week or something. He'd not ask for a break. A break is just an excuse to hook up with someone else, or a way to break up without actually saying he wants to break up. Although, at the end there you do say he has told you to your face that you are, in fact, broken up. You're not on a break, there is no such thing as "a break". You're broken up. The writing is on the wall. He is not your boyfriend, he is your ex. Move out, you can't live together with him any longer. And yes, he most definitely is flirting/hooking up with other women.
A
female
reader, oldbag  +, writes (16 October 2012):
 Hi
You've been together 8 months, you've been fighting for months, your definately not compatable.
You moved in together before you even knew each other,he is only home after work,weekends he vanishes.Hes texting somebody late at night.
He has told you its over,finished,done.
Dont wait for his forgiveness because it isn't going to happen. One of you has to move out.You need to let go.
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (16 October 2012):
 You are broken up, you are not on a break. He may be seeing other women now, he may not be, but the relationship is over. There is no taking time to work things out. He is past that stage and is behaving in a cold and hostile way indicating that he has no intentions of trying to fix anything. Time to move out.
...............................
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (16 October 2012):
 Yeah, you're NOT on a break.
You two are OVER. This relationship is in the coffin.
Either he moves out or you do. Right now, you both are roommates, free to date and see whomever you want to. You want it to be "a break" but he doesn't.
If he wants to be the one to break up, he should get out. Tell him to pack up and leave.
...............................
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (16 October 2012):
 I dont really understand what you are asking here....read this back to yourself:
He said, "broken up, what part of that don't you understand"
I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you the same thing, what part of 'broken up' dont you understand? How many times does he need to tell you that you are not together any more? THE RELATIONSHIP IS OVER.
Start looking to find somewhere else to live and get out of the house, you cannot live with an ex so you need somewhere else to live. Even if it is with friends or family for a short time, you need to get out otherwise you wont be able to move on.
There is no point in worrying about him texting other girls because YOU ARE NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND ANYMORE. Leave him to do whatever he wants, its none of your business anymore.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (16 October 2012):
 This is so not a good situation.
1. MOVE OUT… or get him to move out.
Living together after two short months of dating… wow… not a great idea. You two barely knew each other… and now that you are only together 8 months you are on a BREAK… if you need “a break” at 8 months in, to be honest I do not hold out hope for your relationship.
2. You are on a break and still living in the same home… MOVE OUT… even if you have to go home to mommy and daddy…
3. Tensions are high and you resent him… 8 months in… NOT good…
Two weeks and he’s texting someone else.. the writing is on the wall and it’s over honey.
YOU don’t consider the relationship over.. just on a break… what does that mean? A break so he can sleep with and date other women?
What do you need to be forgiven for?
He considers you broken up… I assume you moved into his place… YOU NEED to move out… it’s over clearly…
...............................
|
