A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I apologise that this is long but i'm really upset and need help.I was with my boyfriend for a year 8 months and we were so close. We'd known each other since kids and he thought I was the one he wanted to spend his whole life with. I was his first girlfriend so I understood when he broke up with me (to some extent). He said he didn't know if he loved me anymore. He's just started Uni and to begin with I didn't speak to him in order to give him space.He kissed someone else at Uni and said it didn't feel right and he was thinking of me.When we finally met up (I'm at Uni 10mins away) it was liked we'd never parted, he was hugging me loads and all the affection was still there (and still is when I see him). We ended up in bed together and even after that he was really affectionate with me and says he thinks about me. It definitely wasn't a case of him using me. He gets sad whenever I talk about what would happen if I move on.He says we're meant to be together but not right now cos' we're young. Despite this, he doesn't want to give us another try because he says he'll hurt me again. We've arranged to meet up again in two years time on a certain date if we ever lose contact for some reason.What should I do? I'm so confused.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2007): I don't know what to say... I am so sad right now with my situation. I met this guy and we are dating for 6 months. He is great, but last week he told me that he wasn't sure about our future together and his feelings for me.
Gezzzz.... it hurts so bad... so bad
He ask me for a brake and here I am... waiting
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2007): I went through almost the very same thing... which is how I ended up on here. Except I think I'm a little further down the road than you.. meaning I've went through the meeting up and shacking up and hearing that he loved me and finally got to the point where we both decided to try dating other people and not to contact each other except every now and then. "& he just needed five yrs to date around and figure out what he wanted and be young and he'd come back and marry me." Well now it's down to 3.5 yrs before we're supposed to be reuniting and I just found out that he's looking at rings and planning on getting engaged soon to his current gf. They've only been dating a year. We dated off and on for 3 yrs. My advice is to let go if you can. I've been happily dating a guy for 9 months but have held myself back from truly falling in love with him for fear that my ex would return. In the meantime my ex has found his "future wife." It hurts just as much now as it did then. Don't waste your life like I have. I now believe that if it's really meant to be then it would have been. And that he's in my past for a reason. I feel so stupid for not realizing that all along I was just a back up plan in case he didn't find anything better. & now I'm finally really moving on with my life.. because I have no other choice but to. Basically I'm saying you deserve someone great who's going to love you everyday of your life. & if this guy really loved you like that then he wouldn't be able to risk losing you to someone else. Go out there and find that guy.. & NEVER look back. Otherwise you're just going to find yourself in a lifetime of heartache. Good luck girl! I wish you the best!
"Never long for anyone from your past, there is a reason why they never made it to your future."
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (3 November 2007):
 If you were really meant to be, he would NEVER have wanted a break in the first place.
My guess is that he wants to play the feild and get some sexual experience, but did not want to cheat on you. I wonder if you and he ever discussed being in an open relationship?
Accept the break as a break up, and go out and start to date new people.
-Frank B Kermit
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2007): this guy seems to be very immature for u. to sleep with u and then say that ur too young i think u should forget and move on with ur life u are young but ur also ready for a real man who knows what he really wants.
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