A
female
age
36-40,
*ammy24
writes:I met my boyfriend 2 years ago on an internet dating site. Just before xmas I went to log into my emails and found he hadn't logged out of a messenger service. I had a look and it was all girls names, and when I went into the emails I saw that he had been contacting people via the dating site until August last year. I'm looking for advice on how to bring this up without him immediatley getting defensive. I don't want to argue with him, I just want to find out what's going on. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Sammy24 +, writes (7 January 2009):
Sammy24 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey thanks for the replies.
i asked him if he was looking for someone else, he denied it so i told him i had seen the emails. He says he had been stupid, and it was kind of an ego boost. He wanted to see that other people would like to talk to him and he'd never wanted to get rid of me. He seemed genuinely sorry and assured me he'd never met anyone else. i've given him another chance, maybe i'm being silly?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2009): i know this looks bad but also take into consideration these girls still might talk to him just as friends. i belong to dating sites and more often than not i simply end up being chat friends w/them. iv chatted w/a few married guys for years and its strictly as friends.
when u approach him dont go on the attach...remain calm. he might have nothing to hide at all.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2009): hi, this is a very difficult one. i've been in a similar situation not so long ago. I also met my boyfriend on the internet and around may last year found out he was on chat sites trying to meet other girls. I don't suggest doing this but my friend set up a profile with almost the same description of my interests, looks etc and started chatting to him. He never actually said anything to me about him being rumbled but a few weeks later his profile had completely disappeared. It is a risky thing to do, i have never actually said anything to him about it and just let it go, but i do think he has an idea that if he does it again its over.
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