A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: HelloWhy is it when girls, like me finally think they look ok guys put us down. I had and am still recovering from an eating disorder, i didn't tell anyone as i felt ashamed. I did things to try and make myself feel better about myself, like having intercourse with a friend who had a girlfriend which made me feel more horrible and used. I feel like my weight is holding me back from getting a decent guy as i'm shy and lack in self confident. I feel like i can't go out with my "thinner" friends as everybody would be looking in disapproval. I've had a weight issue for sometime, but i feel that my eating disorder is restoring itself as i get comments from guys, which i know are jokes but they are hurtful. I feel like i have to put on a front to conceal myself as i might be seen as being to sensitive. I really want true confidence without feeling like i have to cover up my true personality.Do i lose the weight???Are guys picking on my weight bec ause they want me to lose the weight?? I would appreciate your opinion.
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female
reader, Aeval +, writes (24 April 2008):
Darling, EVERY woman has a weight issue at some stage in her life. I am having one as I type this! LOL, The trick is to be thankful you are healthy. Did you know most men actually prefer someone with a bit of meat on their bones? I used to think that was rubbish but I have learnt that its true.
Never let anyone make you feel bad about yourself, I am sure you have many many good points that you over look and if you do have a few excess pounds then go for walks or hit the gym.
The fact that you said you are recovering from and eating disorder tells me that chances are you are "thin".
Did you know that there are 8 women in the world who look like supermodels and over 5 billion who don't?.
Don't be so hard on yourself. focus on your good points, relax and have fun with life. Don't let your weight rule your life. Life is far too short for that type of thing!
Good luck !
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): How big are you sweetie? I only ask as I want to establish whether it is a weight problem or that you are slightly cuddley but have made that into a big thing into your head.
The good thing is that you said you were starting to feel confident and then someone knocked you back - that means you can feel good about yourself, so dust yourself off, get back up and stuff everyone else. The main thing we need to get you doing is thinking differently, you obviously know that you have qualities, Im sure you are beautiful and the only reason anyone would comment on the way that you look is because you make them feel threatened.
Theres nothing I love to see more than bigger girls being happy in their own skin.One of my dearest friends is a very big girl but my God her personality and the fact that she doesnt have a problem with it make her the greatest person I know. Relax and be true to yourself x
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