| A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Ok, this guy i like was supposed to meet up with me, but he didnt. I was going to have a chat with him about my feelings for him, he didn't know this at first, and because i didnt get to meet him, i told him by text, which i probably shouldn't have. I just said that i was confused because i didnt know if he still wanted to meet up , and didnt know what he wanted to happen between us. He text me back saying he did want to meet up and asked me what i wanted to happen. I text him saying it was hard to talk about it by text and i would find it easier talking about it in person. He then said he knows we are only friends now, but if i wanted more we could meet up and see what happens . What did he mean by that ?. I then said i did but it depended if he wanted to , be more than friends that is, and i said i agree that we should see how it goes, but he didn't respond after that.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, wherestheinstructions?  +, writes (22 July 2009):
If you're still interested, contact him asap and just suggest a casual meetup at a cafe, so it's not a date or anything with expectations.
If he's interested and shows up, just see how the conversation goes and if you like him then tell him so and see how he reacts.
Of course, if he doesn't show up or says no, then you have your answer and you can move on.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009): Thanks for your reply.What do you think i should say when i contact him again, before i meet him i mean, and what should i do when i meet him ?.I was upset when he didn't meet up, so i hope he will next time.Also how long should i wait until i contact him again ?.
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A
male
reader, wherestheinstructions? +, writes (22 July 2009):
It sounds like you're both confused.
From the sound of it, he has decided that you are sending mixed messages about what you want - friendship or relationship.
If you want to be more than friends, tell him before he moves on to someone else - it sounds like he is open to the idea but wants to take things slowly.
Texts and emails are OK, but sometimes not good in the early stages of a relationship as all of the non-verbal clues we use to 'read' someone aren't present, and some things can be read in more than one way, so meet him and tell him what you want.
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