A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I had a short separation due to my husband's continual texting of other women over a long period of time, although we rowed time and time again about this problem we had never split up before over it, until I'd really had enough. Howevr we decided to give our relationship another chance although I insisted that i would not tolerate him texting women any longer as it makes me crazy with insecurity, I was totally honest and said that it's not something that is acceptable to me and would never be. I had no reason to believe that he was sexually unfaithfull to me up until we separated , I believe he did it to boost his ego,but as things stand now he's back I know he has another mobile and is probably is still doing it, I have 3 children and don't want to hurt them again by telling him to leave, but find myself obsessing about this situation and no longer know when he is lying or telling the truth. There is no point confronting him about the other phone I know he will lie and tell me yet again he's doing nothing wrong. I've asked him if he's been unfaithful during our split that I need to know the truth to move on, he says no but something tells me he's lying. I went through so much pain during our separation I don't think I can go through it again, but at the same time I can't live my life with a compulsive liar.....Help any advice?
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female
reader, willywombat +, writes (10 December 2006):
 By texting other women he is making an emotional connection with them which is bound to cause you hurt and pain. I suggets if you bin this idiot then you do it for good. If not then you need to look at how your life will be if you stay with him, his behaviour will cause you more hurt in the furture and dominate you life with doubt and worry.
Sack it off now.....
A
female
reader, Lolly3 +, writes (5 December 2006):
Try to find his other phone. When men are drunk seems to be best time as they forget things!! I think the advise before about couples counselling is a good idea - If he agrees maybe you will find out what is going on and will know whether or not he is worth the pain you are going through.
Good luck xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2006): Your predicament is all too familiar. You say he's just texting women to boost his ego but he knows the devastation he's caused you in the past and the fact that he's still doing it - or at least you think he is - suggests his ego is more important than your happiness as a couple. Would he agree to go to counselling? It's clear you love him very much but without him recognising that his behaviour's a problem you won't be able to move on, and although it's a cliche it's true that without trust there isn't really a relationship. Tell him your suspicions and explain how much the lack of trust eats away at you. If he loves you - and I'm sure he does - he'll agree to couples' counselling. Good luck - I really hope it works out for you xx
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