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male
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anonymous
writes: Theres a girl i've been friends with for about a year now. Shes a bit fragile and I don't want to hurt her but I don't know what to do.A couple of Fridays ago, we both were pretty drunk and ended up having a bit of a snog. I just took it as a one-off, but she took it a lot more seriously than that.She is getting a bit too clingy now, e.g keeps texting me, asking me when we can meet up and saying how she loves me. I want to stay just friends, but don't know how to tell her. Any tips?
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female
reader, bonym  +, writes (31 October 2006):
 Some say a "kiss is just a kiss" but it simply isnt the case. Kissing is highly intimate for some and a kiss can cause all sorts of sensual emotions in a person, so to you it may have just been a "snog" but to her it meant a hell of a lot more than that. You need to be a bit gentle with her but ultimately totally honest, if you knew she was fragile then you have to accept you did wrong by kissing her because of her fragility she wants more from you and its understandable why. Be gentle, but be honest. Good luck. xXx
A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (31 October 2006):
 I don't think there are any easy ways around this so to my mind the best thing you can do is be frank but try and say it in a way that emphasises you still care about her. I have to ask, is the clinginess the reason you only want to be friends with this girl because it seems to me that there maybe some feeling there for this to happen in the first place??
I also have to say that its not exactly clingy for her to take a kiss as meaning something more, especially if it was a full-on snog. It's possible that she has harboured these feelings for you for some time and she has innocently taken this as a signal that they are reciprocated. When you do talk to her it might be worth being a bit apologetic too.
Emphasise the positive, how much she means to you as a friend and how much you care for her but just explain that you feel you can only be friends. 'Spin' things to the positive to cushion the blow, create a relaxed atmosphere beforehand but above all don't lead her on anymore, be open about how you feel. Hope that helps.
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