A
female
age
41-50,
*anders
writes:Why does my bf watch porn w/ brother and sister having sex? He gets defensive when i asked him about it. We rarely have sex because he says he's tired but waits until i go to bed then masterbates. Does this mean he doesn't like having sex or is that he has sexual feelings for his sister?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 December 2019):
 Does he want sex with his siter?
The answer is probably (I can't be more specific as I can not read his mind) ... No.
It's the notion of something taboo that is a turn on. The fact that the "actors" in the porn are supposedly siblings, that is what turn him on. It's "forbidden", naughty...
However, for some people there might BE an attraction to a sibling. I think though (as you mention nothing about his relationship with his sister) that it's probably the taboo factor.
The fact that he doesn't have sex with you but rather masturbate, might be that 1. he is a lazy partner/lover or that he can't get excited about sex WITH you anymore. NOT that it is YOUR fault, sometimes over time the frequency can drop down which is kind of natural.
Also, a "quick pull on the doorknob" doesn't require much from him. No foreplay, no need to work on getting you satisfied, nada - it's ALL about him getting him, no care for you. You can "just" do yourself, right? (in his mind).
Is this new behavior? How is your relationship otherwise?
Personally, I'd have a "how are WE doing?" talk with him because SOMETHING is up.
It doesn't sound like you are content with this guy, so... what's up with you?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2019): No, to answer your question, he does not fancy his sister as if that was the case he would be looking for girls who look like her on the porn rather than brother/sister porn.I suspect he is turned on by the forbidden fruit side of the porn rather than what it actually is. He is probably turned on by the fantasy of having sex with somebody he knows he shouldn't be having sex with. That said, at this point it IS just a fantasy and doesn't mean he will actually go out and be unfaithful - fantasy and reality are two different things.My concern would be drawn the the fact that he is using porn as an alternative to sex with his partner. That is the action of a lazy man. A lazy man is what you don't want.So collar him about it - demand to know outright why he has become lazy and is turning to porn to satisfy his needs whilst leaving you frustrated. If he refuses to address it, or makes promises with no actions to follow then what you have yourself is a live-in friend at best. You then need to decide if you can go being in a sexless 'relationship' with this person.
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