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female
,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend just broke up with me. We've been together for 2 years and he went travelling a couple of months ago, we planned for me to join him as soon as I finished studying, which would have been in a few months time. We'd been emailing and texting each other, and we missed each other and everything was fine. Then last night, he called and basically said that it's over and he wants to be single. He said that it's unfair on me if he feels he could cheat on me while over there. It was completely out of nowhere, I thought he loved me and I don't understand. We talked for 2 hours and he was crying, making me think he's not completely certain about it all, so I don't know what to think. I hate him for this - it seems he just got an easy way out of our relationship and he has left me heartbroken and with all these plans that can never happen as I don't want to travel alone. My whole life is a mess now. I don't know what I should do- should I contact him and try and change his mind, or should I just leave it and try and forget about him? Please help.
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female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (15 July 2006):
 He has broken it off with you very probably because he has a major case of cold feet.
You need to get over this. Throw yourself into living your life. Hard I know, but hook up with old friends and try to see new ones. Dont contact him and belittle yourself begging him back.
Imagine if he had done this whilst you were away travelling, and thiank your stars for your lucky escape.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2006): This is a tough situation. Either he wants to go for other girls, he already has cheated on you, or he's just confused and depressed because he's not with you. I'm in a similar situation, except, I identify with your ex more. I have worried that I may cheat because I am in a long-distance relationship, but the strength of my relationship keeps me from even coming close. When couples are forced to become long-distance with each other, the relationship is tested. If the relationship is good and strong, you can make it through the long-distance period. Often, though, one or both partners just can't handle the stress of being in a long-distance relationship. Being away from your partner really lets the true colors show. I never thought I would be the one to be tempted by cheating. Maybe your ex just wanted some freedom and availibility to other women. Whether you choose to contact him or not is entirely up to you. It really depends on how you think he might react. I don't know him, so I can't say. Either way, I hope you have a fall-back plan for what to do with yourself. I know I do. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope everything works out okay for you! Stay strong!
~RJGirl
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