A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have been married for 4yrs, our relationship is volatile up and down although we have a very healthy sex life. Before he met me, my husband had very few girlfriends, worked 7 days a week, he was 40 when we married. Things have got steadily worse, He can be very easily frustrated and angry has hit me once and can be a womaniser, this is alcohol related, he can be a different person without it. I am constantley forgiving him for abusive outbursts after rows which I have not started, he says he loves me, but I think he really wants to be loner again and cannot adjust to family life. He has two lovely step daughters who adore him, but he has vent his frustrations out on one of their boyfriends recently which I cannot forgive. I feel we have come to the end and I want to separate, I have not told him yet, but feel it difficult to make the break as I have a lovely home and dogs and have no where to go. Just feel in a complete rut and don't know wwhere to turn.
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male
reader, Wild Thaing  +, writes (21 July 2007):
 Go with the counsel of your inner voice. It's pretty clear to me what it is telling you.
He's hit you - Dealbreaker!
He's abused his stepdaughter's boyfriend - Dealbreaker!
How do you possibly think this kind of abuse is okay? Rationalizing his violent behaviour only sends him the message that you condone it. So do you condone his behaviour?
This marriage will work only if he gives up the booze and both of you work hard at the relationship under the guidance of a professional counselor. Good luck and take care.
A
female
reader, LJB0427  +, writes (21 July 2007):
wow difficult situation...firstly dont blameyourself for any of this it happens alot! i would say if u want to try to work it out with him then get some help go have marriage counseling and if your girls need it to then family counseling and he should get some help with his alchol problem if he wont go give him 2 things either he goes or you guys leave if he decides the other one then hes not worth it and he doesnt deserve you guys so say adios!
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