A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been living with my bf for about a year now. We've been together for 5 years now. We are both from California, but we live in New York now 'cause he is working in NYC and I moved in with him.. The problem is that every time we come back to california to visit our family we go apart to our own parents house. I stay at my parent's and he stay at his parents. He says that it is disrespectful to my family for us to stay under the same roof without being marry; which I understand but then why doesn't he propose if he is so conservative. We have come to California to visit about 5 times; and every time is the same story. I am angry ; 'cause I think he uses that excuse to sneak out during the night. I am also not happy, 'cause we never get to spend our vacation together; it is like a vacation apart from each other; and we always end up fighting. We are not talking to each other at the moment because he got mad at me and stop talking to me and I refused to go after him. I am always going after him. He just sent me a text saying: we need to fix our relationship, I am getting old...we don't have much time..then I replied : Grow up..then he replied back: yup, I might need to grow up.. but away from you....I am not answering; and at this moment I don't want to talk to him ever..what do I do?
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (30 August 2010):
 I dated 2 guys that were like that, plus it was also out of respect to their parents who were old fashioned. Do you have any proof that he sneaks out at night? I don't blame you for not replying either...if he wants to talk then he can stop being childish and apologize for that comment. Now, 5 years together and given your age you guys haven't talked about marriage or children? Course you can't force him to propose this one sounds like a late bloomer..and there is commitment there, you moving with him to NYC. To fix the vacation part, I would suggest getting a hotel room for however long your staying that way you can spend time with each other's families then go to bed together at night. About the argument, he's bound to apologize because you guys are going back to NYC.
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