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female
,
anonymous
writes: Okay...so I'm a teen and i got a crush on my best friend and she knows it..and she was a tease but then she started to kinda stumble too. i mean she doesnt like me like that but it was almost because of the mystery that it made us seem to think of each other that way..but i dont think i really like her anymore but i think its more the idea of having someone to think of when u cant sleep and being so close to her cuz she's my best friend so we already are on that level of closeness and shes a total cuddle bug. but now her mom thinks im gay and is tryin to pull her in but she didnt even know that i was struggling with it in the first pace..she just thought that cuz we were so touchy feely..which sucks now cuz my friend and i havent even gone over to her house now cuz i dont know how to act with my friend around her mom. and i feel bad. and we both realized we need to change in a lot of areas on our friendship, now i dont think i feel attracted to, lets just call her Shea cuz its a pretty name. So I dont like..like shea but i do love her as my best friend and i want to be able to hug her and stuff and we would spend the night at eachothers house she would fall asleep cuddled up next to me..it was a comfort a friendship. we both felt safe..and she has a boy friend and their physical so its not like i think shes gay, and i dont want her to be. we talked about kissing once cuz we just were wonderin but we never did..we didnt want to do something we would regret, so i know we love each other and its a friendship that will last but my question is..whats too physical for a friendship? i know in front of her mom i wont touch or even get close to "Shea" i mean i wont ignore her but we both discussed that we just dont get close and make her Mom wonder anymore, but still..with or without the Mom..whats too physical?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2006): If you ask me, it's normal to want to be physically close to someone you love, be they your child, lover or friend. Obviously there's different kinds and levels of physical closeness, but heck, even if you both decided to try kissing, that's fine! Just make sure that you put your friendship first.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2005): If you are older than 12, probably sleeping in the same bed is being too physical. Obviously, kissing or anything more sexual would be out, as well. In most cultures, adults do not hold hands, unless they are intimates, and you are too young to do that. So, don't hold hands in public. Greet her with the same kiss that you see others greet you, or her, or other people. In some families, there are no embraces, or kissing. IN others, there is. When in Rome, Do as the Romans do.
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