A
male
age
41-50,
*addad
writes:My gf of 6 years and I recently split up. We have 3 young kids together. I moved out around 6 weeks ago and we were meant to be on a trial "break" for 2 months. I dont want us to split up and basically chased her for a month telling her I loved her and beggin for another chance. I havent done anything on her, she just said she didnt feel the same way about me anymore. She told me on phone a week ago that it was over and wouldnt even meet up with me to talk about it face to face. Since then I have left her alone but shes sending me txts now saying she wants us to be friends. She hasnt sent me any txts in past month. I dont want to be just friends with her as I love her. Should I leave her alone or try to be her friend? I really want her back.
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male
reader, Royofthe Rovers +, writes (18 April 2007):
 To be honest you are putting pressure on yourself and on her by continuing this.
If she is adamant that her feelings have changed than flirting with her and trying to get back to the way things were will back her into a corner.
What if she still does'nt want a relationship in the same way you do? How hurt are you going to be?
I have been in a similiar situation and I can say that I had to walk away. To be friends with her and not be able to be as close as we were hurt more than anything. Knowing she did'nt wan the same things I wanted just made things harder.
Will you cope if she starts seeing someone else? Realistically you have to put her before yourself. Is it fair on her to base your relationship on trying to get her back, rather than as a friend? This is just going to be confusing for you and her knowing where you both stand.
Only you know what she is like and if there is a REAl chance of things returning. Think realistic, not idealistic. You might be better moving on with your life, she may come around after a time you never know.
Time apart can work wonders, but dont count on it. Get yourself back to normal without the emotions overiding your every thought.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2007): I know this is hard but u should send her a text saying that u r willing 2 b friends still,then u will at least get 2 see her!Then flirt wiv her a little but not 2 much!!!
U never no if u stay friends 4 a while then she might want u as a luver again soon as well!
I hope this helps!x
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