A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i was living with my first girlfriend for 2 years and i love her to death. We lived in a really small apartment though (couldn't afford more room), I felt it was becoming too strained and we should live apart. She broke up with me citing she had been miserable anyways (which i knew wasn't true), we still saw each other throughout the next month, but during that month i got really mad at her about her never telling me about an std she had at the beginning of the relationship...(i found out at the one year mark by mistake...she owned up and i forgave...but the subject came up at a bad time i guess....now when i called her she said she has a new boyfriend and all i did was bring her down and she mothered me and she will never go out with me again.....i'm really in denial and i want her back...i only went though the motions towards the end of the relationship only to create a little space for myself, and i in turn made myself out to be a negative, apathetic person....i really didn't think she'd not want to have anything to do with me at all and pick up a new more successfull (which is killing me) boyfriend......i need her back.....to make my black hole deeper, i got layed off from my job, and quit the pickup job i got because i can't seem to get out of my own head...either thinking of good loving times in the past or how i screwed up and will not get another girl because i'm not successful....you would think her telling me never again would be enough, especially with her new boyfriend around, but i am stunned and want her back....how long should i wait to contact her again? i think she does love me still even though she says she doesn't...i disappointed her too much....what should i do?i know my question is long but i felt it had to be to get the scope of the situation, please, please publish it....thanks for the help in advance
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (23 May 2007):
 If she has a new boyfriend then I guess everything is on the back burner. You could contact her just to say that if she and her new boyfriend don't work out then she should look you up. In the meantime stay busy looking for a new job and get on with your life, if it is meant to be it will be. Success doesn't just happen, it takes a lot of hard work. Good luck.
A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (23 May 2007):
 At this time, you're both hurt. If she's got a new boyfriend already, then he's either a rebound, or they were together at the same time that you were together. If she's moved on, don't waste any more emotion or energy on her. Tell yourself that you deserve better, and it will eventually find you.
DV1
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