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male
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*iknas
writes: My girlfriend and I broke up yesterday, ending a 11-month relationship. She broke it off because she's unhappy with us, and thinks that she's unhappy with us because she's unhappy with herself. She said she still loves me but wishes to break it off to deal with herself first. The question is, do I obey her wishes and just leave her to deal with herself, or not give up on us and try to help her?
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (12 December 2005):
Well what do you think would happen if you did stay and tried to help her deal with her issues? Do you know exactly whats wrong and what are her issues? Do you have any idea of how you can help her? It seems to me that she has issues that she needs to be able to solve herself, sure you can support (whether that be as a friend or bf). I think its great that you are willing to stick by her, but I think its best to obey by her wishes. Let her know that you there to talk and listen and just be a friend if she needs it. Also this raises the issue of are you prepared to wait around for her? And how long with she take? I think you both need to talk about that and also the issue of what about seeing other people, are you both ok with that since it is a 'break up'. And in her opinion is there a deffiniate future for the two of you?
Talk all that with her through I think is the best thing to do and obey what she would like. I hope I have helped. I hope it all works out for you, that she works out her issues and that your relationship works out. take care
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