A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I broke up about a week ago and he said we would maintain a friendship. I have sent him a couple of emails about routine things and he is not responding. I do not know if I am more hurt by the breakup or by the way he has cut me off...does not even have the courtesy to respond to me. It is not making feel very good about myself and it really hurts. Why is he acting like this and how should I respond? I am hurting really badly and am really confused.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2007): As the other aunts have tried to indicate to you, once a relationship is ended, that is exactly what it is, ended. In other words - "finished", "over with", "no more", part of your past history.There were things about your relationship that were evidently not satisfactory to him, or to you. There was a reason for the break-up. Think about that, and about the qualities/behavior you did not like.A week is a very short time since it ended, so you are bound to be hurting. In time the hurt will fade and you'll move on.However, you can make it easier on yourself by not contacting him again, and thinking how rude it is of him not to respond to the email you did send.Truth is, you really should not expect to hear from him anyway. You and he no longer inhabit the same "universe" so to speak, once a relationship is over.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (27 August 2007):
 You need to stop trying to contact him. You left the ball in his court. Now is the time to focus on you. Breakups are always painful but just think about how you won't be wasting anymore time on a relationship that was not meant to be. Stay busy, go out with friends, time is your best friend right now. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, sweetheart.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2007): I agree with Smeedie, but I know this must feel really rubbish sweetie I mean he was obviously a big part of your life,
But when you break up with someone your brain plays tricks on you (its true) and makes you think of all the happy times and how much in love you once where,
But all part of the healing process is remembering why you both decided to break up in the first place,
Time will take off the rose tinted glasses, you need your confidence building, try some tips off the net it can point you in the right directions I found this site for you www.communicationconfidence.com maybe they can help also “Its called break up cos its broken” by Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt and they have a free website that accompanies there book
Guarantee you didn’t drive him away because you where not enough, and theres someone who will appreciate your quality’s one day, He has done you a favor you would never get over him if he was still hanging around and you would get hurt this way your looking proud and strong if you don’t reach out anymore,
Take care and you can always mail me if you want to chat
Keri xx
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A
female
reader, NiX-bAbY  +, writes (27 August 2007):
Hiya,Ive been through the exact situation myself (still am sort of).My ex would be really ignorant, and i would ask myself 'how can he suddenly cut me out of his life'. The fact is guys dont tend to show emotions v-well, and he may find that speaking to you straight away will only make him feel worse, he needs time to get over you (my ex told me that) When i was in your situation i would be constantly texting, ringing and trust me you wont find an answer doing this.I think you should have no contact for a while and if your ex wants to get in touch, then he will. i know it hurts but theres nothing you can do at the moment and you never know if you suddenly stop contacting him, he may just contact you.If he does then just play it cool and see what happens and if he doesnt you'll know he wasnt even worthy of your time.Good luck xx
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A
female
reader, smeedle +, writes (27 August 2007):
 Oftern when people break up they say they will remain friends as they feel this softens the blow of the deed.
I would try and move on now as he is doing, you are new in break up world and time is only healer, wishing he will contact you is just prolonging the heartache and is ultimatly going to make the healing take longer.
I always recommend a clean break if possible as this makes moving on easier.
Heartache is not called that for nothing, we really do hurt and it is so so painfull but life has ups and downs and that is that so sorry love you just need to put this man behind you into the past were he belongs and move forward.
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