A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 18 and I find myself in the worse position ever. I've been with one guy since I was 14 we break up but still see eachother regularly, speak everyday and sleep over each others houses every week. Where I've known him since I was so young I feel so connected and a comfort from him. But always on social net work sites (that we both agreed to be friends on) he writes things like he's inblove with another woman, and always goes on about his 'mistakes' he's hurt me so many times but he always comes back to me, says he loves me and that he needs me. I'm just so confused. He's all I've ever known and loved. I've never been close to another male other than him. But is he in love with someone else? I feel so worthless and ugly and taken for granted. It breaks my heart to see things as if he loves someone else. Am I just an idiot? And being used? But how can you use someone who been so good to you? I don't understand. I try my hardest but I just don't feel like I'm enough anymore. The hardest thing is letting go. In my nature I just can't do it! Seems impossible I'm totally devoted to this boy. I feel so sad about this situation. Does he love me or not? Does he regret not being with someone? And am I just his temp fix? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, serenity80 +, writes (25 August 2011):
You've never been so close to another man because you haven't given it the opportunity. Whilst you love this guy, and save yourself for him, you will never be able to meet anyone else or feel any level of deep feelings for them. But that doesn't mean you can't, or won't feel something for someone else.
I think you know what you need to do, and that is accept that he does not see you in the same way that you see him. No wonder it is affecting your confidence, it must be horrible for you.
You say you can't let go, but you know how this will end if you don't. You will get older, and before you know it, you will deeply resent him for having spent so many years pining for him.
I'm sure this guy does care about you, but he is not realising the damage that he is causing. You are the one that needs to be the stronger person in all this, and have faith that when you close off your life to one person, you allow yourself to open up to someone new. You will never have exactly what you have with this guy, but you will find something new - something that will be better, because someone else will love you in the way you want to be loved.
You have a tough road ahead of you, but there is an amazing future out there for you to have, but you need to make the right choices in life for it to happen.
A
male
reader, Thelaird1 +, writes (25 August 2011):
 I get the feeling he is trying to make you jealous. It seems he is playing with your head to try to find out how you really feel about him. I would tell him you will give him the space to work things out with the other woman and say to get in touch once his head is clear.
This will see if his feelings are true, but I feel it will be you he wants to keep by his side
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