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writes: I have been living with my boyfriend since November but only gave up my apartment in May. We have been having more and more problems, we both are seeing therapists and psychiatrists and are on meds. I have severe anxiety and some depression. He had a very abusive childhood and is depressed and has anger issues, and we both have very stressful jobs. We "trigger " each other - my anxiety makes him stressed and angry, which makes me more anxious. We also do have some love for each other, there's no doubt. We saw a couples therapist until she moved out of the area but she said we had lots of issues so we didnt get close to working it all out. My boyfriend wants me to continue to live here but on a different floor of house/bedroom/bathroom, and for us to still be monogomous, but be separate more so that we can work on our own issues and not trigger each other. I've been living downstairs for a week and we still see each other. In some ways it is less stressful and better but I am wondering if it is unhealthy for me, and my essentials are in laundry baskets because furniture is in his room. I am so confused. I cleaned out my savings moving here, but my family is willing to help me move out to my own apartment (although I feel awful about that, I have a great income and should be self sufficient, but it ended up costing thousands, my whole savings, to move here). Is it possible for us to live together but separate? Moving will be expensive and stressful and then I will be alone and lonely. And right now my job is super-time consuming and the move and emotions around it will drain me, I don't know how to get it done without collapsing. But living here is weird. any advice welcome!
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male
reader, somewhat_anonymous  +, writes (20 August 2007):
I think you two juts need space. Is there a way to stay living like that and limit your time together so you can work on these issues?
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female
reader, flower girl  +, writes (19 August 2007):
 Money should not come into it babe, obviously you are a proud women, but i honestly think if you two have that many issues they maybe you should move out, except the offer of help from your family and start again.
It does not mean you have to stop seeing each other if that's what you want but i do think you both need your own space.
Take care.xx.
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