A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My fiance and I have been engaged for 3 months and we have been together for just over 3 years. I am not happy with him and from what he says when we argue he is not happy with me but I know he won't leave me. I believe he may love me more then I love him. Things have become so comfortable I am finding it very hard to leave. I don't know how to tell family or where I should go. His family has never really cared for him or 'us' so I don't think they would be upset. However I can't find it in myself to leave because there is no where else to go. I have been off work with a back and hip problem and he has been supporting me for the most part. I know this isn't going to work because I can easily see myself with someone else and being much more happy with out him. When we argue we have both said very nasty things that cannot be taken back, he walks towards me until I'm up against something (ie. Wall, Couch etc) and screams with his finger in my face towering over me. Sometimes I feel like I hate him. What should I do? Everyone thinks we are perfect together but they don't know. Please Please Please help. He is 26 and I am 21.
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male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (9 October 2007):
 You are 21 and you think that you have no where else to go?
Good grief that is a pretty lame excuse. You have your whole life ahead and if you two are already at breaking point what the hell are you still doing together. Can you imagine what you would be like in 5 years time? Scary isnt it.
Do both of you a favour, move back with your family and get on with your life.
Both of you have plenty of time to find partners you are suited to. This is just life, sometimes we meet people, fall in love, then it just disappears and all of a sudden we are left with nothing but arguments and high blood pressure. Its time to move on.
Good luck.
p.s just one thing niggling away. Were these feelings present before your back injury? If they werent it might be worth it to examine the possibility that these negative feelings are a result of the pain and discomft you are experiencing.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2007): my advise is end it now before it's too late. don't get married to someone that you are unsure about...you should only marry someone that you are sure that you are doing the right thing with, and happy about the decision that is suppose to last a lifetime.
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