| A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hello All. I never thought I'd fall for a married woman since I 'KNOW' how wrong this is. However, I realized that it is possible even when you're 30 y.o to fall hardly for someone regardless of that they're married. The thing is that she's falling for me too. We never declared it but we've reached the point that it is now more than obvious. I was married but I got divorced recently. She is married and she is so unhappy in her marriage. What we have is a pure emotional connection, we knew each other for long months before this spark happened. However the spark is too strong now!!!This is my first time in my life to post something like this online, but seriously I want to listen to insightful opinions of people who don't know me but can understand the situation. Opinions please?
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affair, divorce, married woman, spark Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2008): Hold your head up and walk away. I am married with 3 children, had an affair for 5 months and know exactly why woman have affairs. She will not leave her husband, and you who are recently divorced need someone and of course are happy to wait in the wings waiting for the scraps to be flung out to you. Reason why I say this is because the person I had an affair with, ended it and is now having another affair with someone who is also married with three children and I see the danger signs. Kepp your self respect
A
female
reader, bfly36  +, writes (29 September 2008):
 Hi,i must start by telling you that you cant help who you have feelings for but you can help what you do with those feelings. I have a friend in a similar situation. His girlfriend lives with her husband and she is unhahppy and asked him for a divorce. If you continue in this relationship you have to be aware that she may NEVER leave her husband but use you to make herself feel better. If she goes back with him, you will be left heartbroken and have spent months or years in an unsatisfying relationship. There is research stating that most people that have affairs do not stay with the person they are having the affair with. I would waid until she leaves her husband until getting involved with her to protect your feelings and emotions. Good Luck!!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008): There are men with integrity and men without which one are you?
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (28 September 2008):
 You may have a connection but what you're both doing is wrong. End one relationship before starting another. Period. You can paint however you like to make it seem OK, it's not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008): This is a issue about YOUR LIFE. If there´s something I´ve learn is that no one else cares about our own issues but ourselves.
If you love this woman and you are SURE she loves you back, and you feel both can be happy together go ahead and do what you want.
Only one advice, when someone takes a decision on what to do, see all the consecuences about what that desicion might carry.
If there´s children involved, divorce agreements, how to arrange things once you get together, etc.
Once you´ve made that , is up to you on whether how, when and where you do it.
Good Luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008): i think this woman needs time to think clearly about what she is going to do... you have come through the hard part of getting divorced - if she did want to leave her husband firstly she would have to tell him which i can only imagine is so scary to do - she has a long troubled way to go. Especially if her hubbie thinks she is leaving him for someone else.
I guess you just have to tell her how you feel and that you will wait - but at some point she must decide whether to give her marraige a go or leave - whether it is to be on her own or to be with you. I feel sorry for her its like everyone is pulling at her strings - you must give her time - i think - however this is your life too - you cant wait around forever. You should lay your cards on the table and let fate run its course
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