| A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 months and we both love each other. I am a virgin and she is also a virgin so our experience isn't exactly overwhelming. I don't know if she is ready to have sex yet or what, but I have never loved someone more than I love her and I want to lose my virginity to her as well. I don't know how to communicate with her about sex or how she feels. Help me please. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (22 May 2008):
I understand you find it hard to talk to her about sex. Most people do!!!! I think its one of those situtions where you have to kidna just bite the bullet and do it.
My advice though is- dont bring the topic up when you're "in the mood". Bring it up at a time where you have lots of time to talk and in a private place.
Just say something like 'lately ive been thinking about sex and was wondering what are you thoughts on it'. Or whatever you feel comfortable with really! The important thing is, finding out if shes ready, and making sure she knows that if shes not ready then thats perfectly ok too. Also if you both decide you do want to have sex, then remember to talk about the prevention of geting pregnant too. Together come up with a plan of how you are going to go about this- for example condoms and the pill.
Hope this has helped :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008): If you know that she is a virgin it sounds like you have already in fact communicated to her about sex.
It's natural to feel shy about these things, but if you talk first it will make it nicer if and when you do have sex. You would then both feel more at ease, having talked about insecurities and things.
You don't have to rush to have sex. The better you know each other, the more you will feel at ease to talk about things.
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