A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi - i am an 18 year old guy and have shared a nice relationship with a very cute girl. I love her very very much and am commited towards her. we never got physical in the first 3 yrs- but have started getting a little physical lately. To me - it is very important to give her the space and time for our relationship to be well understood. and i have never wanted to hurt her. We are moving towards having sex - but we both are virgins. I REALLY DONT WANT TO HURT HER . I have heard how much it hurts- the girl- to have sex the first time. but she is very dear to me and i cant see her in pain. i am always very gentle with her as i like her smooth feel.( basically i dont wanna hurt her in anyway anytime)Is there somthing i can do?
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male
reader, ABC_ABC  +, writes (12 May 2008):
Well me and my GF talked alot about it, about what we were afraid of and so on. That really helped because it really took the pressure off the whole thing and we (she) were a lot more confident and relaxed! BUT ... (sorry but there always is something =D) even though we were completly confident and sure about this, she was in a lot of pain anyway... that is different for every girl/woman. Some say it doesn't hurt at all and some say it does. But you should make sure that she tells you everything what she's afraid of so you can take all the precautions you need to, to put her at ease. And then during sex, just remember to go very slowly... and always ask if she's doing alright... if she sais stop you stop immediatly! =P I hope that's helping a bit. All the best =)
A
male
reader, ABC_ABC +, writes (12 May 2008):
Well me and my GF talked alot about it, about what we were afraid of and so on. That really helped because it really took the pressure off the whole thing and we (she) were a lot more confident and relaxed! BUT ... (sorry but there always is something =D) even though we were completly confident and sure about this, she was in a lot of pain anyway... that is different for every girl/woman. Some say it doesn't hurt at all and some say it does. But you should make sure that she tells you everything what she's afraid of so you can take all the precautions you need to, to put her at ease. And then during sex, just remember to go very slowly... and always ask if she's doing alright... if she sais stop you stop immediatly! =P I hope that's helping a bit. All the best =)
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A
female
reader, Angels1have1wings  +, writes (11 May 2008):
 Hi
Can i just say first off, you seem like a very genuine guy and you clearly feel alot for this girl.
I wont lie my first time was painful, but it's not always the same for everyone. My best advice is to make sure that you are both relaxed, that will reduce the chances of it being uncomfortable. Take it slow there is no need to rush into it. Give her walls time to open to your enterance and only go further in if she says you can. This is a new experience for both of you so don't be afraid to ask each other "are you okay?". Just try not to worry and if you want, although this may seem embarrasing but it is nothing to be bashful of really, have a bit of KY jelly or some kind of lube near by. That might help with the process.
Just both of you relaxand enjoy the process...
hope that helps
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