A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I went home to my sister's wedding and I met this guy, he is Danish, anyway, we end up getting so drunk and we spent all the wedding day together, to make things short I went back to his hotel room and we had sex. I was actually the one that coaxed him too, he seemed a little bit intimidated by the whole process but hey I never thought this was going to happen. We ha a lot of fun.BUT....2 days later he called me. Yes, he asked for my phone number the next morning and I gave it to him, but I never expected that he was going to call me, that's not the standard procedure, I was expecting a nightstand and that's it. So he called and asked if I wanted to have dinner with him before he leaves, I accepted and we are going this weekend. I asked my sister's friend about him and he told me he is not the nighstand kind of guy, you know he is not a 20 year old idiot he is 35 years old. Do you think that was really not a nightstand for him? He got a divorce two years ago and has not been in a relationship ever since. He lives in Germany ( and I do too) because of his work. My sister suspects that maybe he saw me before someplace and liked me, but my sisters friend never told me anything about it. What do you think? I usually dont trust men, I've had horrible experiences, but I dont want to just tell him because I dont to scare him off you know?
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divorce, drunk, one night stand, wedding Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, SensitiveBloke  +, writes (31 May 2013):
 If you don't usually trust men and have had bad experiences in the past, it would be much better not to sleep with people so quickly! Get to know people well first and take things slowly!
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (30 May 2013):
 RELAX is KEY agreed.
As for why he called
he asked for your number
you say you "coaxed him" to the activity and he was not comfortable so ONS are probably not in his activity...
I would enjoy the date this weekend and expect nothing else other than a pleasant time. It's a DATE NO WORRIES...
and maybe he just wants to get laid one more time before going home...
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A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (30 May 2013):
I for one am surprised that he called, which is very atypical for a man after a one night stand. I would be even more surprised if it lasted more than a month.....
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (30 May 2013):
 Go ahead and date him. he seems decent enough and does not think of you as a one night stand, he just might be a keeper. Relax and enjoy. If you want something meaningful I suggest you hold the sex and get to know one another or he just might think that was all you wanted - a man for sex.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2013): He wants to have one more one night stand before he goes back. So, you can go and enjoy your dinner and the time you spend, with sex to end things, or you can decline his invitation.
Or you could go and have dinner and not have sex. If the guy is really into you, he will contact you later on and move mountains to get to know you better and a possible relationship if you are interested.
Just go and have fun and don't have any expectations.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2013): He sounds like he'd like to get to know you more... The fact that you had to coax him to a one night stand says his intentions are noble
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2013): If he didn't have any interest, he wouldn't have followed up to get a phone number. He even used it!!!You trusted him enough to go back to his hotel room and have sex with him. So trust him enough to go out to dinner. Stop thinking miles ahead of the present. He only asked you for a dinner date. You received a positive endorsement of his character from your sister. He was invited as a guest at your sister's wedding. He didn't strangle you in your sleep in his hotel room.Can he trust you? You're the one with man-trust issues; and YOU aggressively approached HIM for sex. I'd say he was in the more vulnerable position here. No one mentioned anything more serious than dinner. Normally that comes before sex. Have a wonderful time!
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (30 May 2013):
 Relax and enjoy your date. keyword:relax
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