A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I came out of a long term relationship since I was 16. I havent much experience with guys. I went on a date with a guy I recently met - make a long story short on our first date he ended up staying with me at my friend's house as he missed his last train. We slept together in the same bed and just cuddled and kissed. The next time we went out on a date, he ended up staying at mine and we slept together and cuddled and kissed lots and he took my top off. I ended up giving him a handjob as I didnt want to have sex. On the third time I saw him I stayed over at his and we stripped to our undies and again cuddled and kissed. I have only ever been with one guy - I told him I cant have sex with as I am not ready and everything is new to me. He seemed understanding and didnt try to pressure me in. But now I am thinking - is this slutty behaviour? I mean maybe I gave into those things too quickly? Will a guy have less respect for me? I mean I havent had sex with him - but I guess it was as good as having sex? I am a bit confused by my behaviour and now wondering if he would see me as one of those slutty easy type girls? Does that mean he would never have respect for me now?
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (6 April 2010):
So you told him that you are NOT going to have sex with him and you are asking if he's seeing you as slutty?
You need to relax. He's been told things will go slowly and he's still around. He obviously likes you and respects you or he wouldn't be willing to put the work in.
As long as you give a man boundaries for him to try and earn the right to cross, then he will respect you.
You've told him you aren't doing certain things so work on having a great time with him and making him see how amazing and lovable you are rather than stressing out about every move you make.
Good Luck!! xx
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