A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Did I handle this right or was I inflexible?I have been seeing a man for many months and there have been "issues" mostly around him being too busy to make plans etc.. So he travels alot for work and was in town for only two days. He told me how much he missed me and wanted to see me so I said I had the day off on Thursday ALL DAY and could meet him anytime. I waited, most of the day, and finally at 800 he says for us to go to a 10:00 movie. Thing is I had to work in the morning and this was a little too late for me so I declined accepting that it might mena I wouldnt see him. He asked me this morning if I was doing anything tonight but I reminded him that I was working. A I feel like he didnt hear meB Should I have just gone last night late even though it really wasnt what I wanted and wouldve continued this pattern of him always getting it his way??COmments appreciated. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, oldbag  +, writes (29 September 2012):
 Hi
It sounds like your both into your careers and they are time consuming. He has to travel,which is tiring and you have to be up early in the mornings
I dont see a 10pm movie as late, but if you wanted to see him in the day you should have specified that. You need to make it clearer. I see how you made the effort to have the day off and that you were waiting for him to call, but he may have wanted a lie in then had plans himself, especially if he had been out of town.
I think you need to talk,you need to decide if he is what you want,your both busy people and to grow the relationship you need time together,quality time.
A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (29 September 2012):
Well for starters you haven't really mentioned a pattern, just one instance. Travelling really drains oneself so I'd imagine he isn't too sharp about certain things. Instead of waiting all day you could have just gone and met him yourself. Couples usually go out in the night so I am sure his request was not out of the ordinary. You did tell him "anytime" as well. Isn't it possible for you to suggest a date during the day?
Like you said, this isn't what you want so why don't you just tell him what you want? I mean..it just seems like you are wasting all this time when the both of you should be trying to spend time with each other. You have to work hard as well in relationships as in your career if you want to be truly happy for a long time.
...............................
|
